What Does It mean That "Iron Sharpen Iron"?

The phrase "Iron Sharpens Iron" is found in Proverbs 27:17; "As Iron Sharpens Iron, so one man sharpens anpther."  There is a mutual benefit in the rubbing of two iron blades together; the edges become sharper, making the knives more efficient in the task to cut and slice.  Likewise, the Word of God is a "Double-Edged Sword", Hebrews :4:12; ""For the Word of God is full living power.  It is sharper than the sharpest knife, cutting deep into our innermost thoughts and desires.  It exposes us for what we really are.";  and it is with this that we are to sharpen one another -- in times of meeting, fellowship, or any other interactions.    

15--Signs That Shows Someone Is A Real--True & Loyal Friend:

Friends are very important in our lives.  If you If you have just a few Close, True, Loyal  and Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends, tha will stick by you "No Matter What" -- "No Matter Where" -- "No Matter When", then you have a 'Love-Bond' that will be "Rock Solid" for a Life Time!

And if you have that one True, Loyal, Honest, that you know without a doubt, you can depend on one another no matter what, then you areone of the most blessed people in the world.  Essentially, True Friendship is an Expression of the Love of Jesus' Character.  Whether you find Friendship in your True Love (your Life Partner), or someone that you are close friends with, there may be a time when you question if this person is really a True and Loyal Friend or not -- and that's okay.

Even Well Established Relationship need Reviewing once in a while.  No one would like to invest time into a relationship that is unproductive or heading nowhere.  These 15-Signs of True Friendship will determine whether or not someone in your life is a Real-True, and Loyal Friend:

1. They Support You In Everything: A Real True Friend, Will Encourage You--in anything that you try.  They will be there every step of the way, looking for opportunities to help you grow and succeed.  Your Cause becoms their Cause, and their Cause becomes your Cause.  They will rejoice when you are making progress and celebrate with you.
2. They Stick With You Even At Your Worst: Life has its Ups and Downs.  For many people, it's easy to stick around when the going is good, but not always when thing are rough and tough.  A Real True Friend is not one of these many people, he or she is truly different.  They will be there "No Matter What."  They are the friends that are "All In--for the Long Haul."  They will be there whenever the going gets rough and tough, your worries become their worries.  They share your success, as well as your failures.
3. They Forgive You For Pretty Much Everything, Because They Know The real You:  We are all human and we screw up sometimes.  With a "Fake Friend" a mistake can cost you a friendship, but this is not the case with a True and Loyal Friend.  A Real Friend Forgives, because he or she values your friendship more than your mistakes.
4. They Always Have Your Back: Whether You Are Wrong or Right; once the deed has been done, a Real Friend will 'Always--Stand' by your side "Np Matter What", they will take your side and fight for you no matter who is on the other side.  But, even so, they will rebuke you and correct you whenyou are totally wrong.
5. They Constantly Keep In Touch: Fake Friends will only contact you when they need something or when things take a turn for the worse in their life, or when they feel like they are there to do you a favor by them showing up.
6. They Keep Your Secrets and Hold Everything Privte and Confidential: No One knows you quite like Real True and Loyal Friens, not even family members, other than God, because He knows us better than we know ourselves.  If anyone is privy to your dark side, as far as human contact is concerned; it would be your Real True and Loyal Friends.  A Real Friends values your confidence and will keep your secrets safe with them.
7. They Make Time For You: A Real Friend doesn't just stay in touch via calls or chats, or text messages, they really make time for you, because you are part of one another's life.  If you need them to help out with something really important, they will find time for it.  They will also squeeze out time to spend casually with you, even when they have a busy schedule.  And they won't make excuses for not spending time with you.
8. They Are Always Loyal and Faithful: A Loyal and faithful Friend is a True Friend.  Such a friend is someone who is Unwavering in their Devotion to you as a Brother or Sister, and any agreed cause.  He or she would not "Ever" betray you or give cause to doubt your friendship, and can be trusted to keep their world.
9. Yhey Don't Ridicule You or Put You Down in Public or In front of Others: A True and Loyal Friend knows your flaws and Weaknesses, just like you know their, but you both accept one another regardless.  The person that you know does not go about mocking or humiliating you, especially in public.  A Real Friend will showcase or boast about your bright side, whils helping you to work through through your weaknesses wherever they can.
10. They Are Always Open and Honest To You: A True Friend Is Real, they discuss things openly and honestly with you and do not of mask their feelings.  A True Friend will tell you the Truth, even if it hurts.  That's not to say that they don't care how you feel, they actually do care, a lot.
11. They Keep Their Promises and Keep Their Word.  A True Friend always goes out of their way to keep their promises to you.  If something happens that makes fulfilling a promise difficult, a True Friend will be sicere in telling you, instead of making excuses, and they would find a way to make it up yo you ata later time.
12. They Are Trustworthy: A True Friend should be a Trusting and Trustworthy person.  Yo are going to be sharing a chunk of yoru life with this person or persons.  So, it is important that they be someone you can genuinely trust and who can trust you as well.  The thing about "TRUST" is that it's something that is earned.  A true Friend will not only earn your trust, but do everything to never break or betray it.   
13. They Know and Understand You: Part of what makes someone a True Friend is their understanding of you and how well they know you.  A True Friend should to undersatns and know for sure what you can and cannot do or handle physically, mentally and emotionally.          A Real Friend may even understand you more than some of your family members.  A True Friend will always have your best interests at heart!
14. A Real True Friend Will Remember Things About You That Others Take For Granted: What we care about, what we think about and what we talk about---they Remember.   A True Friend hardly ever forgets any event that is dear to you.  When they can't make it to a celebration, a true friend will always be proactive about telling you.  Also, when it comes to discussions, a true friend will remember most of erything about your life, because they are true listeners.
15. They Think About You--Sometimes Even Before Thenselves: Thinking of others before oneself, is an attribute of True Brotherly and Sisterly Love.  A True friend is a loving and Genuinely Caring Person.  Such a person will always look out for your best interests, sometimes to their own detriment.  True Friendship is all about scarifice.                      

Prayer for True and Genuine Friendships:

Heavenly Father, Omnipotent Father God; Lord Jesus, Holy Spirit;

There are times in my life when I need true and genuine friends, a comforting arm, a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, or even just sensible good advice.  And truthfully, there are no true friends for me to turn to.  No one who I can relate to or anyone that actually cares about what I am going through.  It leaves me feeling broken, empty and lost.   Fill me Lord, with Your Divine Holy Presence.  Allow me to feet Your tender, warm embrace wrapped around me, as I sit here and cry out to you.  Lord Jesus, i come before You with a humble heart, seeking Your Wisdom and Guidance in my relationships.  Lord, Your Word in Proverbs 18:24; tells us that ther is a firend who sticks closer than a brother.  I ask You, Lord Jesus to guide me towards these kinds of people, friendships and relationships characterized by mutual respect, understaning and love.  Please surround me with those people who are True-Strong-Honest and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends who will be there 'No Matter What" and enable me to be a friend who is willing to safrifice, to understand, to love unconditionally, just as You have loved me.

In Jesus' Name I Pray, Amen.

Proverbs 18:24; "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother."

John 15:13; "Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friend."

Ecclesiasres 4:9-10; "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.  But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up."

To Be A Man After God's Own Heart Means:

You must Obey God and Do His Will; in one sense, we acn say that a "Man After God's Own Heart" is a man  who seeks daily to obey Gos and does what He says.  Acts 13:22; "....'I have found in david the son of Jesse, a man after My own heart, who who will do all My Will." 

Here we can see the relationship between the phrases; "aman after My Own heart" and "who will do all My Will."  While "Obedience" is certainly the right word to use, many think that the connotation of this word can ofter be a bit misleading.  When I hear the word "Obedience" I first think of just fulfilling the order or request from your superior regardless of how you feel.  "Obedience" in that sense is not wrong, but it can also be cold, lifeless, and a bit robotic at times.

But, htis is not what God meant whe He said that David "will do everythig I want him to do." When we look at the life of david, especially when compare it with the life of Saul, we can see that David obeyed God because he felt compelled  to please God.  david cared about the desires of God.  His heart was after the things taht God's Heart is after.  David cared about what God cared about.

As Jesus was transitioning fro boyhood to manhood, He got separated form His parents and they went on a frantic search looking for Him.  At the age od twelve, He said to them, Luke 2:49; "Why were you looking for Me?  Did you not know that I must be in My father's House?"  Perhaps this is the only story we ahve about Jesus before He was a full grown man, because this lesson is the main lesson every boy needs to learn to become a man.

JESUS: The Ultimate man After God's Own Heart, was all about His Father's Business.  His sole focus on Earth was to obey His father, because He loves His father.  Luke 22:42; "Father, if You atre willing, remove this cup from Me.  Nevertheless, not My Will, but Yours, be done."   

To Be A Man After God's Own Heart; You Must Love God More Than Everything Else In This Life!

What set david apart from Saul was his love for God.  Obedience is the sign of love, as Jesus said in John 14:15; "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments."  Love is the foundation of obedience.  If you struggle to obey God, it may very well be because struggle to truly love God.  It could be because of the lack of trust, you love God in your heart, but it seems like God is not fulfilling promises or allowing everything to always go agaisnt you, so you struggle because of the lack of trust.

David obeyed God better Bavid truly loved God more than Saul.  It was David and not Saul, who was the primary author of the book of Psalms.  David wanted to write songs about God.  Saul wanted songs written about himself.  When David started becoming successful and the women started singing a song honoring him, and Saul states in 1Sammuel 18:8; "They have ascribed to David ten thousands, and to me they ascribed thousands, and what more can he have but the Kingdom?"  David was a worshiper of God, Saul was a worshoper of himself.

King Saul Followed People---King David led people!

Because David's relationship with God was vastly different than Saul's relationship with God, David was empowered to ahve  a very different relationship with people than Saul did.  In short, Saul wanted to be worshipes by people and praised by man.  He was chasing after his own glory and not the Glory of God.  David was a man chasing after God's Own Heart, because David was not a man who tried to win the hearts of men.  David's heart wanted to please the Heart of God.  Men followed David because David followed God above everyone and everything else.

To Be A Man or Woman After God's Own Heart, We Must--Without Hesitation--Repent whenever We Fail:

While being  a man or woman chasing after God's Own Heart is about Obeying God, having the same desires as God' sheart, and seeking to please God rather than people, a man or woman after God's Own Heart, also Repents Deeply when he or she knows that they have failed and sinned.  God already knows that No Man or Woman can or will ever be Perfect.  To be "A Man/Woman After God's Own Heart" we don't need to be perfect, we need to be humble.  We need to be repentant whenever we sin.  Weneed to be men and women who rely fully on God and His race as we seek to follow His Heart.  We will fail many times in our life, but we need to get back up again and keep following our Lord and Heavenly father as we depend soley on Jesus Christ and His gospel for the power we need each day.  That's the only way to be a Man Truly After God's Own Heart!     

A Prayer for A Heart God:

Abba-Farther God, Lord Jesus; Holy Spirit; 

I come before You today with much gratitude for Your Mercy and Grace.  I come to You in prayerseeking to know You more and to follow Your Plans for my life.  Please help me to cultivate the simplicity of devotion to You.  I want You to be by my side and to be my primary ambition in life.  Lord, I desire to behold Your Beauty, and dwell in Your House for alll Eternity.  Help me to be one who seeks after Your Beauty  daily.  Help me to discover Your emotions and the purposes of Your Heart.  I want to be a lover of God and thirst after You daily, Lord God.

Holy Spirit, Teach me daily to renew my mind and how to align my heart with my Heavenly Father's Heart.  I recommit myself as a man/woman after God's Own Heart.  I choose to seek Your face daily in everything that think, say and do.  One thing I ask from You Lord God; this is what I seek: That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, and receive the blessings to  overflowing  that have to pour out in my life, that I may share it with others in need.

In Jesus' Mighty Name I pray these things, Amen.

Psalm 27:4; "One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in His temple."

Psalm 42:1-2; "As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for You, O God.  My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.  When shall I come and appear before God?"

Psalm 17:8-9; "Keep me as the aple of Your eye; hide me in the shadow of Your wings, from deadly enemies who surround me."

Psalm 27:8; "You have said. "Seek My face."  My heart says to You, "Your face, LORD, do I seek."

Psalm 18:1-3 & 19; "I love You, O LORD, my strength. The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.  I call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised."....."He brought me out into a broad place; He rescued me, because He delighted in me."   

Being True--Strong--Honest and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Men takes a lot of trust from both side of a Freindship!

When You Really Stop and Think About It; Di you know what it takes to build Strong Christian Male Friendships with other Christian Men?

For me; when I weighout things or the elements of building Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendships with other Christian Men; especially in todays totally "Misdirected Cultural Society', the first thing that comes to my mind is, Being Authentic!

Male relationships that truly go teh distance are "Authentic"; so all I can say is "Be Yourself and Be Real!  Allow The real You To Emerge.

Being the "Real You" menas 'No Masks', so, take off that mask taht hides your true self from others.  It means beign Vulnerable to other men.  Strong Friendship grow where the roots go deep.  I mean really down deep, to the depths of your heart.  One of the hardest things to do is, don't allow yourself to hide behind surface comments, such as answering the question, "How are you doing?" With the response of "Ok, Good, or Fine", especially if you are trying to truly be authentic.

A Relationship ---Friendship that is Real include sboth your strengths and your weaknesses.  Be open, real, vulnerable, honest and sincere.  Share your struggles with yoru Close Inner-Circle Friends.  Risk exposing yourself as you really are, without the masks.  When we risk sharing our struggles with grace-giving friends, we find that they accept us regardless of our faults, and we experience the joy of acceptance.  James 5:16; "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for eachother."

True and Lasting Friendships must be cultivated; it doesn't happen automatically.  Over the years I have lost friends; some turned out not to be what they said they were, and others, I lost because I failed to stay in touch with them, or they failed to even care enough to keep in touch with me, and acted as if I was interumpting the life by reaching out to them.  Spending time together with  friends is essential to keeping friendships strong.  Stay in touch with one another often, make plans to get together for coffee, or for lunch, or going for a hike, or just sit and talk about whatever is on oyur minds and hearts.  Strong, True and Loyal Friendships require Commitment and devotion to one another.

Laugh and Enjoy Some Fun Activities With Your Friends, Especially With Your Close Inner-Circle of True and Loyal Friends.  Do something different with your Inner-circle of friends than what you do with other friends.  Such as a Small  Bible Study and Prayer Group, sitting around a Fire-Pit just to fellowship with One Another.  Go on a Hiking and Camping Weekend.  Your Inner-Circle of Close Friends are there to Serve One Another, Mentor One Another, and Build One Another Up in the Character of Christ.  Sitting around the camp fire pit at one of yoru groups home, or a meeting place that you can sit and talk openly and honestly about each of your lives, your loves, disappointments, failures, praise reports, hopes dreams and needs; as Men of God who are pursuing God's Will for their lives.  There isa tremendous "Camaraderie" that is built during such weekends and gatherings.

Avoiding Isolation: It's our natural Tendency to withdraw from others from time to time, when thikngs aren't going so well, and it can become very unhealthy.  I know from experience that, isolation from the very ones that want to be by my side and walk through something with me, isn't good at all.  Solitude is fine when you just need tot hear what God is saying through His Word and the Holy Spirit, but 'Isolation' is deadly; and it can leave you open to the enemy's attacks.

Friends Are Essential; They Are Not Your Life Force but, They are Essential To Effectively Stand Against Satan's Relentless Attacks:  Close--Trusted, Strong, Honest and Loyal Friends are even more Essential to help to keep us accountable in our daily walk as Christ Followers, (Godly Men).  There is no substitute for a close and trusted.  Someone who will be there 'No Matter What' -- 'No Matter When' and 'No Matter Where'.  That kind of Friendship provides someone who truly cares, who will listen, who will not judge you, but who will comfort and console you.  Proverbs 27:17; "as Iron Sharpens Ironm so one man sharpens another." 

Encouraging One Another:  many of us grew up in families where affrimation may have been withheld or we made to feel as though we had to earn it by doing certain things to prove ourselves.  All of us need encouragement in facing life's demands, worries and defeats.  True, Strong and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends wil be ther to cheer one another on, lift one another's spirit by exhibiting aspirit and an attitude of grace.  They will always be willing to look one anothe r in the eyeand tell them when you each have demonstrated a character quality that you each admire.  Coomit to praying for one another by name evey day of the week.  Put an arm around them and let them know that you believe in them.

Friendships Impact Our Lives For Good or Ill; They're Not Neutral:  If you connect with good people you become a good person, or at least that's how God's Word explains it.  Proverbs 13:20; "He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools, suffers harm."  If you connect with bad people, you become like them in many ways.  1 Corinthians 15:33; "Bad company corrupts good character."  Choose your friends carefully, prayerfully and wisely.

Be Confidential: True and Loyal Friends Hold Confidential Information that is shared with you by your Close Inner-Circle Friends, close to their hearts.  You will damage the friendship and possibly harm your friends if you were to share Confidntial Information with anyone outside your Inner-Circle, even if you think it might be a Prayer Concern.  When I let someone into my Inner-Circle of Friends they must understand that, "Trust is built on a Foundation of Close Confidence" that what I share with them in that Close Inner-Circle of Friends, will stay in that Inner-Circle.

Allow Those In Your Inner-Circle of Friends To Be Themselves, Don't Try To Change Them, That Not Your Job: Give them the freedom to be themselves without pressuring them to become someone else.  Allow them to make mistakes, to be human, loyally maintaining the relationship regardlessof their ups and downs.  1Corithians 13:4-5; "Love is patient, love is kind, it keeps no record of wrongs."

Protect Them All: Protect your Inne-Circle of friends like you would your family members, because they are your brothers and sisters in Christ.  Look out for things that may harm your friends, help to protect them from danger, In Other Words; [Watch One Another's Backs]!     

Prayer for Male Fellowship:

Lord God; as we embrace each new day, instill upon us the strength to live by Your Godly Principles.  May our trust in you deepen, reinforcing our Christian faith daily,  Guide us through life's challenges with unwavering hope and humble hearts.  Encourage us when times are challenging beyond our own strength; and remind us of Your unfailing love.  Help us to look forward to brighter days rooted in the faith of Jesus Christ.  Father God; we, men of faith, humbly invite Your Holy Spirit to guide us in our paths both personal and professional.  We ask that You would amplify our Spiritual Capabilities so that we may be righteous in Your eyes.  Serve as our beacon, leading us toward righteousness and truth in all aspects of our lives.  Strengthen our resolve to walk faithfully beside You always.

In Jesus' Mighty Name we pray, Amen.

Psalm 119:1-5; "Blessed are those whose way is blameless, who walk in the law of the LORD!  Blessed are those who keep his testimonies, who seek Him with their whole heart, who alsodo no wrong, but walk in His ways!  You have commanded Yourprecepts to be kept diligently.  Oh that my ways may be steadfast."

Proverbs 27:17; "Iron Shrpens Iron, and one man sharpens another."

1 Timothy 6:11; "Run from all these evil things.  Pursue righteousness and a godly life, along with faith, love, perseverance, and gentleness."

Psalm 119:1; "Joyful are people of Integrity, who follow the instructions of the Lord."

Jeremiah 29:11; "'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord.  '"They are plans for good and not disaster, to give you a future and a hope.'"            

This Is Going to be a Long One, But, Each One of These Points Will Work If You Let Them Work:  Applying The "Together Values" To Your Closet Christian Inner-Circle of Friends and Family Members:

1. Grant God the Highest Place Within Your Circle of Christian Friends and Family: In this closet of Relationships, do your best to behave in a manner that gives Praise and Glory to God.  Be very aware that you are always in His Sovereign Presence.  Bow down your lives Together before Him, Worship God Together:
2. Let God Precide How You Interact Together; and What You Do Together: Let God have His Way!  Submitt to God Together:
3. Consider What Jesus Christ Might Be Doing In The Lives Of Your Loved Ones and Close friends: Together you are being led by Jesus, sculpted into what He wants each of you to be.  And you each are a part of the process in the other's life.  Together Be Led By Jesus:
4. Together Listen To what Has To Say To You Through Shared Bible Studies: Talk together with God in preayer.  Show your love for Him through obedience when you are together. In this way you all will be in constant communication with God, through the Holy Spriit, the main reason for yoru relationship.  Communicate with God Together:
5. Whenever Your Are Together With You Inner-Circle, Serve God As A Team: Be aware of opportunities to participate in what God is doing around you in the world.  These are great privileges.  Serve God Together:
6. Deny Yourselves Often For those In Your Closest Inner-Circle Of Family and Friends, and For God's Sake: "Agape" Love -- is Self-Denial for the good of others. Faith, Hope, and Love are all Eternal -- and the Greatest of these is Love.  Love One Another Through Jesus:
7. Keep In Mind What Is Happening In The Lives Of Your Closest Christian Friends and Family: Those in your Inner-Circle belong to you!  They are part of your life!  Their hopes, dreams, opportunities and struggles are in some part also yours.  You All Belong To One Another:
8. To A Reasonable Extent, Devote Yourselves Yo One Another's Life, (your inner-circle of friends and family).  Set aside time to pray for and help them, just as they will hopefully do for you.  Spend precious time with one another, so taht no one in oyur circle is made to feel lonely or left out, or lonely.  Be Devoted To One Another:
9. Accept and Encourage One AnotherIn Your Inner-Circle To Be Genuinely Themselves---Just As God Created Them To Be: Appreciate one another's God-Given differences and praise God for His design of each person in your Inner-Circle.  Accepts One Another, Just As Jesus Acceps Each One Of You:
10. Bear With One Another's Faults, Insensitivities, and Little Quirks: Respond with grace.  After all, God does the same thing with each of us continually.  In this way, be like Jesus.  Bear With One Another:
11. Spontaneously Forgive One Another Without Requiring An Apology or Request: Help those closest to you, to treat you better---but after you have forgiven them.  Avoid with all your strength judging others and  assuming God's Role.  Forgive One Another Without Being Asked:
12. Go Out Of Your Way To Find Activities and Solutions That Meet everyone's Needs: If neccessary, especially to be fair or for a 'Higher Purpose', let the others have their say in some things.  Submit To One Another In The Love Of Jesus:
13. Always Br Ready To Serve Your Closest Friends and Relatives: They can use your help with something from time-to -time.  Let them know you are ready when they need your help.  Serve One Another:
14. Identify and Implement The Values, Desires, and Ways Of Dealing With People Through God's Grace and God's Eyes: Identifying and Implementing the Ways of Heaven, are Radically different form those of the Secular-Culture, (The World Values).  Your relationships with your Christian Friends and Family Members, and Christian Relatives should be "Heavenly" Distinguishable from secular culture.  Jesus tells us in John 13:35; "By this allpeople will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another."  The very different love of the Kingdom is the sign of His disciples to the world.  Live as Citizens Of Heaven:
15. Don't Let Life Get Too Busy That You Have Too Little Time For Your Closest Friends and Family Members: Being together is absolutely critical to spiritual growth in Christ.  But this is not just for Bible Study , Prayer and Superficial Social Interaction.  The instructions of the Bible, especially the New testement, make it clear that there is much God expects us to do together as Close and Trusted Friends and Family Members.  Meet Together On A Regular Basis:
16. Be Joined Together By Your Relationship With Jesus, Even More than By Friendship or Blood:  With that as the Primary Reason for your 'Bond'. nothing should be able to separate you.  Also, it is even neccessary that you always like one another, because there will be times that your friends and family members wil do or say something to make you angry.  Loving them is another story all together!  Live Together In Unity Of The Holy Spirit:
17. When You Disagree--Avoid Arguing:  Instead, take time to dialogue until you fully understand the other person's viewpoint.  Bring in other Christian Friends or Christian Family Members to help you avoid quarreling:
18. Never Talk Or Act As Though You Are Better Than Your Friends and Relatives: In humility consider the others as a bit more important than yourself.  Remember that even if you are more obedient to God, compared to His Holiness, you habe only a slight advantage over the next person.  And without humility, that edge disappears.  Be Humble With One Another. 
19. Take The Challenge Of Finding Out How You and Your Closest Chriatian Friends and Relatives can Form Harmonious Teams To Do Things ForThe Lord:  Discuss each of your distinctive contributions to the iner circle.   Think of yourselves a sa "Military Fire Team", trying to find out the best way to complete a mission where no one is left behind or forgotten.  Live Together In Harmony:
20. Practice Lots Of Underserved Kindness For Your Closest Friends and Relatives: Progress toward Unconditional Love and Concern for each one of them.  Ask the Holy Spiritto give you a clear picture of how you receive kindness  from God because of Jesus Christ's death for you.  Don't even think of deserving kindness in return; your treasure awiats you in heaven.  Show Mercy and Be Compassionate With One Another:
21. Periodically CheckTo See That Those I Your Inner-Circle, Have Food, Clothing and Shelter.  Including Heat In The Winter:  And check to see if they might need help doing something or maybe need a ride somewhere, especially if they live alone.  At some time all of our lives, these things might be lacking.  But some in your Inner-Circle  might be ashamed to tell you or ask for help, as well as you might even feel that way.  So be very observant, and let them help you when you need help, or when anyone needs help.  Be Available To Meet One Another's Needs.
22. Treat Each One Of Your Close Friends and Family Members With Equal Importance and Value: Of Course, you will be closer to some, and maybe not so close with others, just as Jesus was with His Disciple John.  But try to never be disrespectful or withhold love, no matter how you are treated.  As you do this to those who like you and those who like you less, you are ultimately doing it for God.  Treat One Another Equally.
23. Generously Make Available To and Share With Those In Your Inner-Circle--The Resources That God has Blessed You With: Be more than Pasively Willing; when you recognize a need, offer to let someone use something that you have.  I mean, if there's something that you don't really use all that much and someone in your circle has a need, offer it to them to use or take it to them.  Share With One Another:
24. Open Your Home Regularly For Those In Your Close Inner-Circle: Feed and Entertain them just to let them know that they are all someone special in your life.  You might never know just how important this might be to those who were excluded by others at some point in their childhood or even in their adult years.  Be Hospitable With One Another"
25. Let God's Grace In The Form Of Supernatural Gifts Flow Through You For The benefit Of Your Inner-Circle: This is very important for what God is doiing in the lives of those in your Inner-Circle.  Enjoy being God's Outlet.  What A Privilege!  Administer God's Grace To One Another:
26. Be Truthful (Yet Helpful) To A Degree Not Possible Outside The Closest Of Trusted Relationships: Only Close Friends and Close Trusted Relatives who have paid the high price of Selfless Love are likely to listen, I mean (truly listen) to one another.  Only in such a relationship can questons be asked and honest answers given that are helpful, even when they might hurt sometimes.  Speak To One Another Truthfully and Helpfully:
27. Place Courage Into Your Close Christian Friends and Relatives, So That They Can Do What God has Asked Them To Do: So much fails to get done because we lack the courage to act as promted by God and His Word.  Probably the most important reason to get together as Christians, according to Hebrews 10:25, is not saying nice things to one another; it is actually fostering courage in one another.  Go Out Of Your Way To Encourage One Another:
28. Honor The Victories and Accomplishments Of Your Close Inner-Circle Friends and Relaitives: Give them Complments, Celebrate and Rejoice with them in their Victories in life.  Especially treat difficult accomplishments in spiritual growth as Significant and Worthy of Joyous Recognition.  Honor One Another With The True--Genuine Love of Christ:
29. Recommend Those In Your Inner-Circle To One Another, As Well As To Those they Might Bless In The Name Of The Lord: Because you are so close in your relationship, you know what each of your friends and relatives has to offer and share with those inside of your circle, as well as with those in their communities.  Recommend and Commend One Another:
30. Lovingly Exhort Those In Your Inner-Circle To Do Good Deeds: In some cases they are resisting, but more ofter they are waiting for someone to believe in them.  This prodding may take multiple repetitions, and that's why this command of Scripture can best be done with your closest friends and relatives.  Spur One Another On To Love and Good Deeds:

I know that all this may seem like a lot of things to pursue in building a Strong-Close-True-Honest and Loyal Inner-Circle of Firends.  I can tell you from experience  throughout my own life.  In the Military, my career as a Professional Fitness Trainer and Sports Medicine Injury Specialist.  I have had a few close inner-circle of friends and some trusted close family members.  Some of them I thought would be life long friends and they were loyal and very trustworthy, at least that's what I truly thought.  But, when it came time tfor those friends and family members to be there for me 'No Matter What', just like I had been for them, they bailed out to make sure that they didn't get any dirt on them by fulfilling their part a close inner-circle of friends.

That's why I write so much about asking God to surround yourself with those Close Friends taht are always going to be True--Hinest--Loyal and strong "Iron Sharpening Iron", Never Back Down or Bail Out Friends; that will truly be there by your side "No Matter What"--"No Matter When"--"No Matter Where" and will expect the same from you!  Any other kind of freindship will never truly last or even be Rock Solid!                 

Prayer:

Father God; Lord Jesus; I ask that You would release the spirit of the fear of God into my heart.  Release thunder from Your  Throne and strike my heart with Your majesty, so that I might live in awe before You.  Release Your presence and holy dread that makes me tremble before You.  Unite and restore my heart to Your Heart,a nd strengthen my union with You Lord, and Your Word, and cause me to delight in the fear of God. Lord Jesus, strengthen my spirit with endurance so that I may do Your Will with all zeal and diligence, and that I do not quit pursuing the deep things of God.  Impart in me endurance for fasting when the Holy Spirit leads me.  Direct my heart into the endurance in which Jesus walked.  This is my prayer for strength and Will to folow through in my committments to God and to fulfill my ministry that You have called me into, even when it is difficult.

In Jesus Most Precious Name I pray, Amen.

Psalm 34:7-9; "The angel of the LORD encamps around thosewho fear Him, and delivers them.  Oh, taste and see that the LORD is god!  Oh, fear the LORD, you His saints, for those who fear Him have no lack!"

Hebrews 1:10-12; "And, You, LORD, laidthe foundationof the earth in the beginning, and the heavens are the work of Your hands; they will perish, but You remain; they will all wear out like a garment, like a robe You will role them up, like a garment they will be changed.  But You are the same, and Your years will have no end."

1 Corintians 13:4-7; "Love is patient and kind; love does notenvy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude.  It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or esentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.   Love bears all things. believes all things. hopes all things, endures all things."    

Have you ever spent an afternoon or evening with a friemd or friends who seem to turn positive emotion into something negative?  I'll bet that you got up and walked away feeling mentally and emotionally drained.  On the other hand, when you spend time with friends who lift you up every time they are around you, you are inspired to conquer the world because of their postive character.

The People That You Spend The Most Time With Should:

• Make You A Better Person, Because They Are Good People:
• Support You No Matter What--When & Where:
• Push You To Meet Your Goals:
• Inspire You:
• Help You To Be Transformed:

Here are some more Inner-Circle "Together Values" to apply to your Group of Close true friends:

1. Share In the Pain of Those That You Are Closest To: It's almost unbearable for them to hurt alone.  Let them know that you hurt because they are in pain.  This is not a One-Time Verbal-Expression.  You need to go with them the full distance from hurt all the way to recovery.  Consider how this is and an act of worship to God, because it reflects Christ's sharing our pain and dying on the cross.  Hurt with One Another:
2. Offer Comfort To Those In Your Inner-Circle As Life Hurts Them: Do something helpful that will ease the pain or loneliness.Because you are close to that person, you have the best chance of knowing what is most soothing, whether that be a hug, sharing a meal or a cup of coffee, going for a drive, taking a walk, hanging out with them all night or whatever needs to be done.  Comfort One Another:
3. Don't Be Afraid To Confess Your Sins To Your Inner-Circle Of Friends and Family: And make it just as safe for them to do the same.  And make it just as safe for them to do the same.  Unconfessed sins keep on hurting and destroying life.  Healing starts with confession.  This absolutely requires the proven loyalty of the closest of Christian Friends and Relatives.  Be Open and Honest, and Confess Sins To One Another:
4. Help Them Through The Consequences Of Confessed Sins and Help Them To Correct The Mistakes That Got Them In Trouble:  Often the aftermath is just too much for them for them to deal with alone.  This is a great privilege in that you will worship God by reflecting the compasson that Jesus had on those in His Circle  when they sinned.  Carry One Another's Burdens:
5. Doubt Comes To Us All From Time To Tiime:  When that happens, as neccessary, quickly do whatever you can to help  restaore your Inner-Circle in the Faith.  Because of your close relationship with the people in your group you can often see doubt and lack of trust coming naturally and can act soon to avert determination of faith.  Restore One Another In Faith:
6. Strive For Holiness When You AreTogether: Your fellowship can be perfect even while individuals are sinful and imperfect.  Present to god the righteousness that is possible when two or three are together with Jesus Christ and Function harmoniously.  Your Meeting are where he can use His different disciples to create perfect and holy "relationship moments" for the praise and glory of God.  Pursue Holiness and Perfection Together and Live Together In Harmony:
7. Carefully Analyze The Fine Distinctions In The Faith Held By Each Member In Your Inner-Circle: It's likely that no one else is close enough  or together often enough to do this, so it may be upto you find where faith can develop further.  Examine One Another's Faith:
8. Regularly Discuss Various Truths From The Bible and Share With Each Other--Your Understanding In Order To Teach and Mentor One Another: Don't rest in a superficial understanding of God's Written Word.  Grow together in deeper Understanding of Scripture.  Teach and Montor One Another:
9. Give Consel To Those In Your Inner-Circle As Life Challenges Them -- When and How The Holy Spirit Directs: As much as possible, base that coounsel on God's Point of View.  Consider what are the "ways of the World" and how your Christian friends and relatives might be receiving and be attracted to such counsel.  Counsel One Another:
10. Live Out Your Faith In Front Of Your Closest Friends and Relatives, Because Your Relationships Give You Great Influence: Your Inner Christian Circle often sees the real you, evem if just subconsciously.  Because your relationships are close, you have tremendous leverage on their thinking and behavior.  Disciple and Mentor One Another:
11. Do What You Can Do To Help Those In Your Inner-Circle To Be Obedient To Their Calling From God:  You will often see the the critical part that each of your closest Christian Friends and Relatives have to play in your discussions and activities, as well as in their other involvement.  There is so much that God wants to do through His people.  So, don't let those in your inner-circle miss the Eternal Rewards that come with obedience to their Heavenly Responsibilities.  See That Each One His or Her Part To Keep The Inner-Circle Strong In The Faith:
12. Be There With Your Closest Friends and Relatives When Discipline Comes.  As Surely As It Will From Time to Time: God's refinement of His people are likened to fire.  As with Daniel's three friends, stand ing the furnace together and see the conpletion of the of God in each of you.  Face Discpline and Judgment Together:
13. Whenever You Are With Your Closest Christian Friends and Relatives,Be especially aware Of the needs Of Those Outside Your Group Who Do NOt Believe in Christ:  Together, be concerned for them and let them see you work together on hteir behalf.  Be the salt of the world when you are togehter.  Be Salt Together In A Bland and Tasteless World:
14. Help Your Closest Friends and RelativesHave The Wisdom Of God In Dealing With Their Secular Situations: Enable them to be in the world, but not of the world, and to face difficulties with Non-Christians in supernatural love and the other fruitsof the Holy Spirit.  Be Wise and Win The Respect of Outsiders and Non-Believers:
15. Take Time In You Fellowship With Your Close Christian Freinds and Relatives To Pray For Outreach Efforts: Perhaps together you can do something that will raise funds and resources for a specific Outreach Ministry, or affirm the work and lives of that Outreach.  Don't reserve this effort just for larger Christian Gatherings.  Uphold Outreach Ministry Efforts in Joint Prayer and Support:
16. Try To Be very Aware Of One Another's Non-Christian Friends and Contacts: Plan a few activities or events where you can invite them to experience how Christians truly love one aother "Heavens Way."  Be careful not to tone down your Christianity so much that itis almost invisible.  proclaim Together Your faith In Christ Jesusand Be The Light To The World Together:
17. Listen Carefully and pay Attension To How Satan Might Be Trying To Deceive You and Your Closest Friends and Relatives, Especially By Twisting The truth: The Devil's subtlty is usually noticeable only to those who are very close to us.  When appropriate examine scriptural truth regarding questionable teachings.  Contend For the Faith Togther:
18. Understand and Take Into Your Lives The full Armor Of God As Described In Ephesians Chapter 6: Notice when any one of yoru closest Chrisian friends and relatives seem unaware of the aromor available for the Battles of Life--or of its necessity.  An Yourselves For The Attacks From From The Rnrmy Together:
19. Since You can Bet Your Life That Satan Is Trying To Harm Those In Your Inner-Circle.  Keep Your Eyes Open and Watch One another's Back: Warn them as early as possible, because it will likely get worse.  And don't forget to advise them against passivity, pushing eaach other to assertively resist the devil>  Warn and Admonish One Another:
20. Since Temptation Is ever To Be faced Alone, Make Absolutely For Certain That You Join The Fught Of Each Of Your Inner Circle Members Against The Seductions They Face: Even minor temptations are probably designed by the 'evil one' to create disasterous results.  Battle Temptation Together:
21. Satan Will Usually Attack Your Friends and You When You Are Each Alone: Rush to their side and join them in the battle.  Don't even let a member of yoru Inner-Circle to be attacked by satan alone.  The devil should ahve to face at least two believers.  Although it's better to be on the offensive against evil, we often need to be on the defensive as well.  Stand Up To The Devil At One Another's Side:
22. Put The Thoughts and Convictions Of Your Inner-Circle To The Test Of Solid Christian Doctrine To Make Sure That The Foundation Of Their Lives Comes From God: Dark Angels are active behind the scenes in the spiritual realm to tempt and deceive.  Test The Spirit Togehter:
23. Togther With Your Closest Friends and Relatives, Learn The Joy Of Being On The Offense Against Satan and His Demons: You and your Inner-Circle can easily find places to fight evil.  Too amny Christians ignore the fact taht we are to march against the gates of Hell.  Satan should be on the run from us, and not the other way around!  Together--Hate Evil and Defeat satan and His Demons and Their Attacks:
24. In Your Interaction With Those You Are Closest To, Take Whatever Risk Love Requires Without Regard For Your Own Security or What Ohter People Will Think Of You: Your closest friendships will occasionally require you to lay down your life, a great privilege somewhat mirroring what Jesus did for us on the cross.  Be Willing To Lay Down Your Life For One Another:
25. Loving Your Inner-Circle Of Friends and Family, You Will Occasionally Need To Go In and Rescue One or More Members Of Your Inner-Circle Who Are Actively Doing The Work Of God: Help them to get out of their situation, heal them and send them back in just as Jesus did with His disciples.  Following the Lord into church as well as the secular communities, is not meant to be easy or risk-free.  Living obediently i the faith will result in wounds for you and your inner circle of friends and relatives.  Rescue and Restore One Another:
26. Be Involved In The Faith Of Your Inner-Circle Of Friends and Relatives Fir The Long-Term:  Even though in our mobile society you might not be around each other until death, be there for one another as you will be.  Be faithful during that part of the race that you are privileged to share with one another.  Remember that [email, and the internet] are just a few good ways to expand how you can stay in touch with one another as you run the race of your faith with your closest friends and relatives.  Run The Full Race Together:
27. Make Sure ThatEveryone In Your Inner-Circle Retains Solid Hope: Bad situation and disappointments threaten hope and drag Christians down.  It's up to their closest friends and relatives in Christ to help combat this threat.  Help To Preserve One Another's Hope:
28. Whenever Those In Your Inner-Circle Face Really Hard Times, Step Up To Help Them To Walk Through It and Help Them In Any Way You Able To Help:  Obedient Living for Christians produces hardships at times.  So do the trials of life.  Let's not tell our friends to rely on God without encouraging them to rely on us as well, since God Himself has said in His Word, that we arer part of His help.  Endure Trouble and Hardship Together:
29. Help Your Closest Friends and Relatives To Take Hold Of The Truths They Know From The Bible, By Putting Them Into Practice In Their Own Lives: Don't let them settle for knowing "enough" truth and coming to a standstill.  Since the Greek word for the "know" that sets us free; John 8:32; "and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." this is truth practiced and proven, make certain that your inner-circle keep on trying new behaviors of faith.  And insist that they return the favor, so that you can perserve and grow as well.  Hod Fast To The Truth Together:
30. If You See Any Of Your Inner-Circle Being Mistreated, Speak Up For Them: Whenever possible, get involved when you see the first signs of possible injustice ofGod forbid (abuse).  If any of your Inner-Circle of Christian Friends or Relatives seems to be bent on Revenge; STOP Them: Help them to depend on God to bring  about justice in His Timing and for Purposes.  Revenge is the natural response ot being hurt or betrayed, but we as Christians have a Supernatural Answer--Love that is fueled by God's undeserved love for us.  The Holy Spirit's Indwelling Presence gives us the power to love rather than to seek revenge.  Forbid Mistreatment Or Abuse Of One Another and Keep One Another From Seeking Revenege:                                               

15--Warning Signs of Fake Friends and How to Deal with Them:

First let me start by saying that even those who you may believe to have your best interests in Building a True, Loyal, and Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendship; may not be the person or person's that you actually thought they were, because you couldn't see their true agenda, because they have learned how to lie very well.  So, let me ask you this:  Do you know why True Friends are considered to be a "Treasure" these days?  It's because it's so hard to find one or threepeople that you can truly trust and count on.  You know; those friends that will be there "No Matter What" even at 2:00 am.  Unfortunately, most of us are surrounded by toxic people who only pretend to be our friends, so long as they can use us for whatever they can get out of us.  And personally, I don't need people like that in my life, and I have had my share of fake friends who turned out to only be there as long I could give them something or do something for them--to make them feel good or look good to others.

The really bad things is, even though Jesus tells us to ask the Holy Spirit to give us descernment to be able to see throuh someon's fake intensions, we don't always put that into action.  And it becomes very difficult to spot these fake friends, because most of them have become real pros at faking freindships.  I have found a list of signs of a fake friend that I want to share with you, that I hope help you to identify and deal with them. 

One Thing that you should always remember; it's better to have one or two or maybe even three close, true, and loyal friends that you know for sure that you acn always count on, than to ahve a wide social circle where you can't tell for sure if all those people are your real friends. 

I have heard it said many times and I say it as well; that God chooses our family members for us, but we are the ones that choose our friends.  That's why if you allow your friends to disrespect you, manipulate you or belittle you, you're the onlt one to blame.  Good frineds are hard to find these days because the world is full of fake friendships.

That's why you should consider yourself blessed if you have someone you're sure you can always count on to be the true friend that you do have.  If you have a solid group of friends, guard those friendships well, because they're definitely one of the most valuable things in your life.  Even though it's become challenging to spot fake friends these days, there are still some pretty clear "Red Flags" of Fake Friendships that we should look out for.  So, if you want to know how to tell if you have a fake friend, just keep reading below.

1. Fake Friends--Use You For Their Personal Gain:  A bad friend will always reach out only when it's convinient for them, or when they need or want something from you.  They don't really want to spend quality time with you or get to know you better.  They will ask you want to get gether only when they need you for their own purpose, and this is one of the most obvious signs of a fake friend:
2. Fake Friends Are Never There When You Really Need Them The Most: Your Closest, most trusted should be someone who is always there for you and you are there for them, No Matter What, No Matter Where, and No Matter When!  And someone who will stand by by your side 'No Matter What' and wants to share everything with you, the good moments and as well as the bad ones.
3. Fake Friends are constantly pointing out yoru flaws and putting down the things that you hold dear.  A good friend is someone who knows you, sometimes better than your own family members do.  They are the people who respect you and embrace all of yoru flaws and imperfections, just like Jesus does without any unattainable expectations.  A good friend is someone who accepts you the way are and encourages you to be a a better version of yourself every day.  Because they know that you will do the same for them.  On the other ahnd; a fake freind will always try to emphasize your flaws and shortcomings, and make you feel bad about those 'Not so Perfect' parts of your life, but will always sing high praises about themselves and try to get you to look the other way where their flaws are concerned.  They know what your bad sides are and they will always try to point them out jsut to hurt you or provoke you into reacting negatively so they can use it against you.  And then whatever you're passionate about, they will do whatever it takes to suck the confidence out of you, and that's something that you should never allow:
4. Fake friends Try To Manipulate and Control You:  Healthy friendships consist of two or more people who try to understand and respect one another's choices and decisions.  It's a healthy relationships where both sides have different interests, different perspectives, and still try to be compassionate and understanding towards one another.  A Fake Friend, will finds ways to use your sincere feelings to try to control your life and friendship.  They will also try to make you fell guilty in order to manipulate you into doing something that they want you to do for them.  And that would just lea to a Codependent Relatoionship and not a true friendship, which would only harm your emotional and mental health and well-being.  The unfortunate thing is that, I was dragged back into a relationship  that I thought was a true friendship, and and it took me several weeks to realize that I am the only one in control here and the other person was still trying to manipulate things for his own good.  So, I just made the choice to walk away:
5. Your Accomplishments make Fake Friends Jealous: A Good and True Friend is someone who will be proud of your accomplishments and always rejoice in your achievements, just as you would rejoice in theirs.  They will see your success as their own as well, because your friendship is truly One Soul separated into Two Loving Bodies, just like our relationship with Jesus.  If you feel like your friend is envious of your success and all your accomplishments.  I'm sorry, but you need to let go of that friendship for your own  peace of mind.  Pray for them to have a change of heart, but maybe is best to sever the friendship and move on.
6. Fake Friends Don't Stand Behind Their Words:  Trust represents the essential Foundation of every Healthy Relationship.  However, we all know that it's something that needs to be earned with time.  That's Why Real--True--Honest and Loyal Friends would never Lie to you, or break their prmises to you.  They are aware that any of these things can cost them the loss of your trust, which can harm your relationship deeply.
7. With Fake Friends---You feel Disrespected in your Friendship:  When it comes to those knids of close relationships, trust and respect go hand-in-hand.  You can't maintain a healthy relationship without any of these.  If your freind is gossiping about you to your mutual friends, it's a clear "Red Flag" they don't truly have any respect for you at all.  And it's also a Warning Sign that they have never really been a True Friend:
8. Fake Friends Constantly Put You Down of Other, Because They Think It's Funny.  If your frineds continuously try to belittle you in front of other people, or go behind your back to make deals wiht other people, it's a clear sign that they don't really care for you or your friendship.  That so-called friend or friends, know that it will hurt your feelings and they really don't care, but it still doesn't stop them from putting you down.  A Good and True Friend will always stick up for you even when you aren't around.  They will never allow anyone to speak badly about you because it's simply what Best Friends do; they always have your back, they don't just say they have your back:
9. Fake Friends Don't Support Your Choices: A Real Friend will always Stand with you, and Beside You, Supporting you in achieving your goals and dreams.  They may not always agree all of your choices and decisions, but they will always try to support them No Matter what!  The Unfortunate truth is though, if your friend does not support you, then that only means they are envious of your success.  This can  only lead tot he conclusion that your friendship is fake:
10. Fake Friends Will Never Defend You In Front of Other People: As I have already said, Real--True--and Loyal Friends will always have your back, even when you're not around.  They will never allow anyone to trash talk you, because protecting your reputation and your name is simply their primary task.  A fake Friend won't ever defend you when other people are trash talking about you, because they simply don't care that much for you.  They just don't have the virtue of loyalty, and that's why they can never build a deep and strong bond with other people.
11. Fake Friends don't care for things that are important to you: In friendships, both sides should have different interests and perspectives.  However, if your friend doesn't care about things that they don't care for you as much as you care for them.  I know that we all run to friends whenever something good happens because we want to share the good news with them.  But there are times, when it's btter to keep it to ourselves because we are surrounded by fake people who only pretend to be our true friends and will never rejoice in our success.
12. Fake Friends Always Ditch You For Their Romantic Partner: If yoru so-called friends who are supposed to eb your "Accountability Partner" are always breaking off plans with you or ignores you every time their dating someone, I think it's pretty clear you aren't dealing with a good or committed friend here.  A Real-True and Loyal, and Committed Friend will always find a way to balance personal relationships and friendships, which are both equally important.
13. With Fake Friends You Always Feel Like You are Walking On Egg Shells: If you don't feel comfortable around that friend or friends that seem to always act like you don't matter, then it's a good indication that you're in a fake friendship.  You should never be afraid of their reactions if they are your true friends.  We all have had days, but being in a difficult situation doesn't give someone the right to lash out .  Fake friends will use you as a punching bag to take out their feelings on.  And they really don't care if it hurts you or how it hurts you.
14. Fake Friends Will Always Put Themselves Up On A Pedestal: If any of your friends have a Narcissistic Personality and you think it's ruining your friendship, you don't have to cut them out of your life immediately, you can still hang out with them.  But if they are putting themselves as the center of the friendship, then maybe it's time to just ties with them all together.  The fact is that most Nacissists can never really have any true friends and build Solid and Deep Rooted Connections with other people.  They will always criticize you, make you feel bad about yourself, and make you doubt your worth.  Narcissists will try to manipulate you and make  you think that they're so much better than you are, and that you need them more than they need you:
15. Fake Friends Are Real Energy Vanpires:They will do everything they can get away with to completely suck the life and energy right out of a relationship.  If any of yoru friends only seem to share negative energy, you should distance yourself from them before their bad vibes start affecting your mental health.  You should cut that person or person's out of your life before they zap your emotional energy.  If you don't, they will feed on your energy until they completely drain the life out of you.                                             

Prayer for Dealing With Fake friends:

Lord Jesus; I stand before You pleading for Your tender mercy against fake friends disguised as true and loyal Christians.  Guide me to recognize those are planning evil, those who plant falsehood among us, and help me to distance myself from toxic and unhealthy relationships.  Bless me with the power of the Holy Spiritto discern lies and understand true words.  I pray that You Lord Jesus, will destroy any evil alter erected by such wicked ones whose deciet can lead to my emotional death.  Give me the strength to fear no evil hearted friend, because I know that You are always with me.  Do not let their pretense bring shame to me.  Equip me with Your Wisdom to resist all appearances that seem genuine, but are really fake, under consideration.  In solemn assertion Lord Jesus, please hear my prayer, bless my relationships and keep them genuineand free of falsehoods brought about by any strange sentiments designed to cause trouble or spread disquietness in our midst. 

In Your Mighty Name Jesus, I pray, Amen  

John 13:18; "I am not referring to all of you; I know those I have chosen.  But this is to fulfill this passage of Scripture: 'He who shared my bread has turned against Me."

Psalm 55:12-14; "For it is not an ebemy who taunts me--then I could bear it; it is not an adversary who deals insolently with me--then I could hide from him.  Butit is you, a man, my equal, my companion, my familiar friend.  we used to take sweet counsel together; within God's house we walked in the throng." 

10--Effecient Ways To Deal With A Fake Friend:

Earlier we talked about the signs of a Fake Friend, now it's time to find out how we should handle those Toxic Friendships.  So, pay close attention to what I am about to share with you below: One thing I have learned about having a friend that was a Narcissist, is because I started seeing those same qualities in myself when I was a Professional Fitness Trainer, and I started losing friends because of my "High and Mighty Attitude" and I didn't like itat all!

1. If you have a fake Friend--Throw them off their Pedestal: Before you can even confront them about their fake Intentions toward you, you should throw them off the pedestal that they have put themselves on.  But, don't put yoruself up on a pedestal either.  They can't always be right and neither can you.  They aren't the smartest, nor are they even the wisest.  They aren't perfect, because they also have flaws, just as we all do.  Their Bad Behavior probablystems from their Narcissistic Personality.  Before you break up that toxic friendship, you should all the harm their behavior is doing not just to them but also to the people they care for: 
2. Confront those Fake Friends:  If you have recognized most of these signs of a fake friend in your friendship, you should definitely confront your friend about it.  Don't do it over Social Media, because that will make it easier for them to avoid speaking about it, but if you do in person, they won't have any other option but to talk to you.  Besides, discussing these serious and important issues over the Internet is really pretty childish:
3. Refresh Your Boundaries and Do Not Back Down: Every time you meet new friends, you have to eb direct and clear about your boundaries right away.  set your limits, and stop allowing people to keep direspecting them and acting as if you should be that they have chosen to call them friends.  If a friend or friends have already violated your boundaries several times and you still aren't ready to let go of the freindship, you can try to refresh your with them and be very clear about the consequences of breaking them again.  And then "Stick to your Guns" on the matter.  It may make your friends positively change their attitude towards you if they truly cherish their friendship with you or they might just get really self-absorbed and try to turn their negative behavior on you and say it was all your falt anyway.  In either case, your Healthy Boundaries will keep Toxic People out of your life and help you get rid of Fake People who really don't deserve to be a part of your life at all!  Other seek to surround yourself with those True--Honest--Strong and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends that will truly be there "No Matter What -- When & Where", because they will always be there to help you grow in the Character of Christ as you would do for them:
4. Get A Grip Emotionally: Realizing that the person you always considered to be a real friend has never really cared for for them, that can take its toll on you emotionally.  You will most likely feel a whole range of emotions, from anger to sadness and despair.  However, you need to move on with your own life "with or without" them in it: 
5. Try To Stay Out Of Their Drama: One of the Warning Signs of a 'Fake Friend' is when they constantly create unecessary drama over the same thing as well.  Don't Over-Exaggerate a Situation.  You Just Don't need The Drama!  There are two possible reasons for it: Either they want to be the center of attention, or they want to make you feel bad about somwthing, and that just allows them to control you.  If you can't end the relationship with that kind of person or if you are at the "Frienemy Stage" of a friendship right now, the best advice I can give you is, to stay completely away from all the drama that they want to pull you into.  Just try to distance yourself from them for a while and see where that will take you in your friendship:
6. Don't Ever Respect Someone Who Doesn't Respect You:  I do believe though, that you should never stoop to their level and behave as they do.  Always try to be the bigger person, control yourself and try to respond to their negativity with kindness or just walk away from the situation and leave them to their own drama.  One thing to remember, you should never respect them if they use every opportunity to mistreat or manipulate you, or disrespect you for who you are.  That would only give them the right to continue, and that would also mean that you lack Self-Respect:
7. Lowering Your Expectations In that Relationship: Tell me honestly, what can you expect from 'Fake People'? Nothing -- Good, Right? That's exactly why you should never set your Expectation too High in a Potential Toxic Friendship.  You can neverexpect those kind of people to be there for you when bad times hit. Always remember this: No Expectations -- Means; No Disappointmets:
8. Don't Ever Allow Them to Make You Doubt Yourelf: Fake friendships; can literally drain you emotionally, mentally and physically, if you let it go too far.  And that can leave aweful consequences for you health wise.  Those toxic people know that it wil be a lot easier to control if they get you start doubting yourself, and questioning your worth.  So you need to always have 'Unshakable Faith' in who God says that you are, because it's the Strongest weapon that you have in Fighting Toxic People:
9. Pay Attention To Your Own Emotional Needs: A Healthy Friendship is when two people share a Deep Emotional Connection.  But, that doesn't ,eam that you should expect your friends should fulfill all of yoru emotional needs.  You shouldn't expect it from fake people at all, because they don't really care about your needs at all.  Being in touch with your own Emotional Needs will also help you to deal with fake friends and toxic people.  You need to be mor compassionate towards yourself and allow yourself to feel your emotions, and then give them over to the Holy Spirit for God's Healing Touch.
10. Simply Leave Them Behind and Move On: The fact that you need to come to terms with the fact that some people need to be left behind.  God wouldn't ever send someeone into your life to hurt you.  However, htere are times when the Blessing of a prayer is answered, like a new job, a new place to live (roommate situaton), what at first seemed like a connection at church that seemed to be open and honest; and then one or some of the people that God has allowed into your life, find a way to manipulate you into thinking that you are the problem and they are the ones being hurt:

God only sends people into your life with His Purpose in mind. to teach us an important lesson.  Now, I know what you're probably thinking!  If God is All Knowing, and He knows what people are going to do before they even do it; then why doesn't He give us some kind of warning as to the true intentions of the people that He has allowed into our lives?

God sends people with a True and Godly Purpose into our lives, to teach us an important lesson.  He doesn't Intentionally send evil hearted people into our lives.  Everyone has a 'free will' and Christians are no exception to the rule.  But, God does want us to learn that we should never give our hearts to others too quicklly; especially Christians or even those who claim to be True Christ Followers.  Because there are certainly those people who claim to beTrue Followers of Jesus Christ, but never really-truly liev out what they claim.  I know this to be very true in my own life, I had a roommate that had been my prayer partner for 18-years, and turned out to be a 'fake friend'.  He showed his true colors when he couldn't manipulate me into doing everything for him, use my resources and time for his own and then stabbing me in back when I asked for his help.  And my present roommate situation has turned out tobe the smae way, except for the fact that we have known each other for almost seven years.  We aren't really close friends, or really even friends, as you would look at how most friends would be, someone in my church set things up because they saw a need in both our lives, he needed an honest roomamte, someone closer to his age, and I needed a place to live, with someone closer to my age, both of us now in our sixties.  I tolerate him for the most part, but after seeing him for who and what he really is, and the "fakeness" of his Christian Faith.  I don't truly know exactly what God's Plan is here for me to still be living here, especially since we are more like the "Odd Couple", I'm a military veteran and he never served and really doesn't have that much respect for the military or veterans.  He's respectful to a point, but always starts a response to any question with "Well, You Know"; I hate that, especially since I really do know, I know who he really is and what kind of person he really is, yet despite all my pleading with God to bless me with the resources to move elsewhere, God has not answered that prayer yet, but I know that this relationship is very Toxic and is destroying me emotioinally, mentally, and physically!

Respect is something that needs to be Earned; 'No One' has the right or authority to demand your respect, and it's not something that is easily given to others.  Trust is another thing that must be earned.  Iam one of those people that will look at you and with a 'Prove It' Look, when you say, (Well, trust me when I say.....) because I grew up not having much trust in to many people.  Even in the miliatry, for the fourteen years of service, there were very few people that truly trusted, because they earned my trust and I earned their trust.  I tell you these things to show you that, this is why the moment you realize someone isn't being genuine and honest with you; you should immediately "Challenge Them" and if they refuse to change, walk away from them and cut them out of your life if that's what it takes.  Praye for them, but don't allow them to continue to manipulate you any longer.

Remember -- You Don't Owe fake People Anything!  I know it's really dificult to leave some people behind because they may frown on you; but it's something that needs to be done to save yourself!

Wrap-Up!

I hope that you won't have to put any of these signs and warnings into action to expose a Fake Friend in your friendships, because I know just how much it hurts to realize taht a person or people that you considered to be a True Close Friends, have been Faking the Friendship all along just to manipulate you for their own purpose, and never really cared about you in the first place.  The bet thing you can do for yourself, is to move on and leave that toxic person in the past.  I know it will be hard and it will tear yo up emotionally if you ahve been friends for a long time, but unfortunately, sometimes it's your only choice.  Sometimes it's just better to open the door and run out as fast as you can, and don't look back.  A Good Rule of Thumb is [Once you decide to walk away -- Don't Look Back!]   

Prayer for Wisdom to Deal with and Remove False Friends:

Father God; I come to You for the power of Your discerning Spirit.  Bestow upon me, divine wisdom to identify false friends shrouded in duplicity.  As I journey through this worl d and navigate life's intricate relationships, grant me the courage to separate myself from those who might hinder my desitny of having True, Honest and Loyal Friends.  Help me to speak with insight as a beacon of hope for family and true friendship around me.  Holy Spirit, guide my path away from wrong; keep my faith steadfast.  In busy crowds or restful solitude, let no deceit charm me under the disguise of friendship.  Help me to identify and walk away from people who are posing as friends, while plotting and planning to use manipulation in order to deceive me.  Lord Jesus, I pray for discernment in choosing peple to build  friendships with.  I ask You to help me to strip away these false friendships from my life.  Fill my heart with peace as seek to build an Inner-Circle of True--Strong--Honest and Loyal Friends who will always be there through think and thin; "No Matter What."

in Jesus' Loving Name I Pray, Amen.

Loving Like Jesus Loves Me and You!

There are Four Key Components to Having a Close-Strong Inner-Circle of Christian Friends: Godly Friends--Family--Mentors and the Foundation which of course is Christ.  All four of these keys components work together to make living life as a Christian a little easier to understand.  These things can be intertwined to work together, yet they are Independently Vital, and Extremely Important.  When I was in the U.S. Air Force, I became a big believer in "Small Circles of Close Friends", that I could always count on 'No Matter What'.   I thought that everyone on this planet should ay one point in their life should have a 'Small Core Group' of Friends and Family that they could stay connected with.  But, sometimes "Life" can get so chaotic that you get lost in it all.  I thought that if I did everything  that I could stay connected to those friends and family members, then I could stay grounded.  But, that just wasn't truly the case, the people that I thought were close trusted friends---Betrayed me and it cost me almost everyting, and one of those people that betrayed me was my wife!  The one person in my life that I truly thought would never betray me.

I know that we as humans, were not created to be alone.    But for a long time after leaving the Air Force, trusting more than one or two people for much of anything was hard.           I know that as a Christ Follower, I need other people to be around and to and to be social with regardless of how I feel, and that there are people who need me.  It has taken some time for me to let my guard down and to let people in again.  Maybe this has happened to you at sometimes or another and you are trying to figure things out so that you start trusting again and building those Strong--True and Loyal Friendships again.

It's hard sometimes to learn to trust again or to be part of a small group of people who truly love to be around you and want you to be around them.  You may be someone who has a hard time these days telling if a person is a real freind or not.  But I know from allowing myself to be vulnerable enough to make new friends, I can tell you that you can learn to build traut again and grow close to a small group of people again.

You may not always see eye-to-eye with everyone in your Inner-Circle of Close Friends and Family, but lettig these people see the vulnerable and transparent side of you may hurt at times, but I promise you that as God leads you; you will learn to trust and love again, and allow yourself to be loved by others. 

I am learning that very thing, by getting invoved in some small groups at my church and meting new people at the gym.  And by asking Jesus to guide me while inviting people into my life in hopes of building new and long lasting friendships with those people who are also seeking to build a Small Circle of True-Strong and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendships with people who will be there 'No Matter What and No Matter When'.

Loving your Christian Inner-Circle of Friends: I mean "Genuine--Agape Love"; the way that Jesus loved His Disciples.  Grant God the Highest Place within your Close Inner-Circle of Christian Friends and Family.  In these Closest Relationships, do your best to behave in a manner that gives Praise and Glory of God.  Be very aware that you are always in His Sovereign Presence.  Bow down and Bind your lives together before Him.  Let God direct how you interact together and what you do together, and let God have His way as you and your Inner-Circle of Close Friends build a Strong relationship and Friendship with one another.  That wil develop into [Rock Solid "No Matter What"--Any Time and Any where] Friendships.   

Consider what Jesus might be doing in the lives of your Close Inner-Circle of Friends and Family.  Together you are being lead by Jesus and the Holy Spirit in one way or another, being sculpted into into what He wants each of you to be.  And each of you are a part of the process in each other's life.  Together listen to what God has to say to you through bible Study, devotionals, talking together with God in prayer.  Show your love for Jesus through obedience when you are together with your inner-circle.  In this way, you will all be in constant communication with God, the main reason for your relationship with Him.  Whenever you are together with your Inner-Circle of Friends, serve God as a team.  Be aware of opportunities to participate in what God is doiing around you in your community.  These are great privileges.

Denying yourself for those in your Close Inner-Circle of Friends and Family, and for God's Sake.  That's "Agape Love"and it's the kind of love that is "Sele-Denial" for the good of others.  Faith, Hope, and Love are alll eternal, and the greatest--the greatest of these is Love!  Keep in mind what is happening in the lives of your closest freinds in your inner-circle.  Those in oyur inner-circle belong to you and you belong to them.  You are each part of one another's lives.  Their hopes, dreams, opportunities and struggles are in some way---yours as well.

To a reasonable extent, devote yourself tot helives of your close Inner-Circle of Christian Fiernds.  set aside time to pray for and with them, and help them whenever they may be in need.  Spend precious time with them so that they will not be lonely or feel like they don't really matter.  Accept and Encourage one another in your inner-circle, to be genuinely themselves as God created them to be.  Appreciate their God-Given differences and Praise God for His design in them.  Bear one another's faults, Insensitivities and Quirks.

Respond with grace, after-all; God does the same with each one of us continually.  Spontaneously forgive one another without requiring an apology or request.  Help those closest to you to treat you better -- but after you have forgiven them.  The main thing here, is everyone in your inner-circle should be ready and willing to serve one another when anyony needs help, because -- everyone needs a little help with something from timw-to-time.  Let the people in your inner-circle know that you are ready and willing to help when they need you!              

Loving Like Jesus Loves Us:

Identifying and Implementing the values of your Inner-Circle: When you begin to Identify and Implement the values, desires, and the ways of dealing with people that, being the ways of dealing with people that, being the ways of heaven, are radically different from those of secular cultures.  Your relationship with your Christian Friends and Family should be "heavenly" distinguaishable from secular cultures.  Jesus tells us as recorded in John 13:34-35; that the very different love of the Kingdom is the sign of His Disciplesto the world; "that we should love one another, just as He has loved them, and to love one another just as they love themselves."

Don't Let Life Get Too Busy That You have Too Little Time To Spend With Your Closest Friends and Family Members!

To Love as Jesus loves means: That we will live the most fulfilling and satisfying wersions of our lives, knowing that we furthered the Kingdom of God rather than leaving our own legacy.  Jesus modeled humilty as He lovingly washed the feet of the disciples, and when He went to the cross, He made the greatest sacrifice out of Love ever known to mankind.

What It looks Like To "Love One Another" as Jesus Loves Us!  What Does "Love One Another as I Have Loved You" Mean?

Jesus was charging His disciples with what seemed impossible.  How could they love others with that same uncomditional love that Jesus demonstrated time and time again.  Jesus knew all of His Disciples shortcomings and growing edges, but He still gave them this new command to love one another just as He loved them.  This This command to love was new in the sense that the disciples would be empoweredim a new way to carry out the same kind of love that Jesus had shown -- a love that included acceptance, forgiveness, and compassion.  It was a love marked by selflessness and putting others above oneself, a love that even trransended cultural normalization and expectations.

Who Is Jesus Speaking To In This Verse?

In Matthew 26:36-40; Jesus is speaking to His disciples.  Earlier in His ministry, Jesus had affirmed the two greatest commandments, the second being to love others.  Once again, in the upper room with His disciples, Jesus taoght on the magnitude of love.  In fact, as Jesus went on, He made it clear that their love for others would be what sets them apart.  Their love toward others would be the very thing that marked them as believers and followers of His.  Before Jesus made this statement, He had just finished washing the disciples' feet.  Washing feet was a common pratice for visiting guests in Jesus' time, but it was a servant of low esteem that would have been assigned such a chore.  Jesus washed His disciples' feet, demonstrating both His humility and His great love.

This is what Jesus did before instructing the disciples to love others just as He loved them.  He waited until after He washed their feet and predicted His death to make this statement, because both washing their feet and laying down His own life were intrisically tied the way in which His disciples were to love others.  As much as Jesus was speaking to His disciples in that room, through scripture passed from generation to generation, Jesus spoke this comand to every believer from then until now.  still true today, our unconditional love and selfless love will be the thing that sets believers apart, as well. 

How Will Others Know That We Are Disciples By Our Love?

After Jesus instructed His disciples with this new command, He explained that when they love as he loved, that's how others would know that they are His followers.  That means when we love people just as Jesus loves us, tey too will know that we are His discples because of the radical love we show. Scripture teaches that we should be different than the world;  se (Romans 12:2; 1 Peter 2:9; Psalm 1:1; & Proverbs 4:14), and the way we love is a major indicator of being set apart as followers of Jesus.

The early church was often noten for the way they loved others and their love was a witness to the validity of the Gospel message that drew people tp give their lives to Jesus.  These early Christians shared  a life-transforming Gospel message and they shared a life-transforming kind of love.  Today, we as believers can allow the Spirit to work through us and demonstrate that same life-giving and selfless love that will draw others to Jesus and serve as a powerful testimony to Jesus' power and goodness.

Prayer for Building and Loving Your Inner-Circle:

Abba-Father God, Lord Jesus, Holy Spirit;

As I seek to to expand my Inner-Circle of True-Strong-Honest and Loyal Christian Friends, I come before You with a humble heart.  Grant me the courage to step outside my comfort zone, the the openness to embrace diversity, and the wisdom to recognize kindred spirits.  Guide me in being completely genuine and authentic, offering friendship without judgment.  May Your love and grace reflect in my interactions, creating bonds that uplift, inspire, and honor You.  Bless me with discernment to nurture healthy relationships and the joy of dicovering the beauty in the divesre tapestry of friendships.  Father God, I come before You with the desire to find that one or two Close-True and Loyal Best Friend -- a kindred spirit who shares my joys, understands my struggles, and walks alongside me in the various season of life.  Someone who will truly be there "No Matter What" and will be willing to share spiritual accountability.  You Lord God, who knows the intricate details ofmy heart's longing, be the gentle guide in this quest.  Lord Jesus, as I seek the Close Best Friend, may Your Spiritguide me in cultivating an open heart, one that is ready to receive and reciprocate a genuine and authentic connection.  Teachiing me to be vulnerrable, sharing not only my triumphs, but also my challenges, fostering an environment where trust can take root and grow.  Help me father God, to be a friend who truly and genuinely reflects Your Love, grace and compassion.  In my interactions, may I mirror the qualities that draw people closer to You.  May the freindships that I cultivate be a living testament to Your boundless grace and the beauty of authentic relationships. 

Thank You Lord, for the gift of friendship, and I trust in Your perfect timing, I know tha You will lead me to the people who will become not just a friend but a cherished conifdant and companion.

In Jesus' Mighty Name I Pray, Amen.

Proverbs 17:17; A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity."

Proverbs 27:5-6; "Better is open rebuke than hidden love.  Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy mulyiplies kisses."

Proverbs 13:20; "Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm."

1 Thessalonians 5:11; "Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing." 

Find True Friends who Sharpen Your Spiritual Iron, as well as Your personal Character.  Surround yourself with those who will push you closer to Christ.  As they spur you on, spur thenm on in a kind  of spiritual perpetual motion.  With God at the center of your friendships, your friendships will draw you closer to Him and expenad the horizons of what God can do through you.

"You must surround yourself with the Dreamers and Doers, the Believers and the Thinkers, but most of all--surround yourself with those who see the greatness within you, even when you don't see it yourself." ---Edmund Lee---

What a Great Qoute: Reading this quote from Edmund Lee got me thinking about community.  Most specifically the writing comunity, and the commnity of my Close Inner-Circle of Christian Friends.  I read where a lady was telling someone that they are the sum of the five people that you spend the most time with!    If that's true, then maybe most of us need to take a long look at who we are hanging out with. 

Who Are You Spending Most Of Your Time With? What Kind Of People Are You Giving Most Of Your Time and Energy To?

If we are not asking God to surround us with those True--Honest, Loyal and Trustworthy, "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends, then we will allow anyone who acts like they are being True and Loyal Friends into our lives, even if they aren't.  Just as "Iron Sharpens Iron" We must Raise the bar in our own lives on who we hang out with and who we share our lives with. 

I hope that you are at least familiar with the scripture; Proverbs 27:17; "Just as Iron Sharpens Iron, and one man sharpens another."  It's a powerful truth that applies on a number of different levels.  The reality is that we al have a choice about who (and what) we allow to influence our lives and as men and women.  To the degree that our mindset and ideas are impacted by the people around us, we are responsible to govern our own miond and our life in light of our circumstances.  And spmetimes that means we have to change the influences that are around us -- or at least minimize the impact of negative influences and people aroound us, in the bad times as well as the good times.  If those five people who you surround yourself with are people that are father down the road than you want to go down and should be going down, you WILL BE POSITLY IMPACTED!  iT'S NATURAL -- It's the way God created relationships to work.

How Do You Find the "Iron" (True Friends)To Sharpen Your "Iron" (Your Character) in Your Life?

Consider the kind of person that you want to influence you in the direction you believe you should be going.  Do you see how this deserves serious consideration and prayer?  Think about it, I mean really think about it.  Write it down in oyur Prayer Journal and if you have someone who is already mentoing you, ask that person to help you insekking God's direction in finding those five people.  Are you looking for those people that you are going to intentionally allow to influence you in your life?  You need to be wise, discerning, and careful as you make up your mind about it.  And then you have to figure out 'How' to get in the same orbit as those people that you are seeking to allow into your life.  It can be hard if they are people beyond your terms of achievement or social circles.  But that where alowing the Holy Spirit to guide you to the people that He will know to be Trusteorthy, Honest and Loyal, "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends to hane in Your Close Inner-Circle.

How Do We Become, and Remain Spiritually Sharp Christians?

God's Holy Word -- The Bible, is the treasure trove of lessons, guidelines, quotes, and instructions we can to direct our lives.  One passage that I believe is believe is important ot out Christian Walk as Men or Women: is Proverbs 27:17; "As Iron Sharpens Iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend." (NIV).

This relatively short verse has a great deal to say when it comes to understanding how we move forward in our Christ Faith.  It also speaks volumes about what we need to consider when determining the types of influences that we may have on others, and the influences that they may have on us. 

Iron Sharpens Iron -- iron tools are amde sharp, and fit for use, by rubbing them against the file, or some other iron; so a one man sharpens the countenance of his friend -- quickens his ingenuity, enlivens his affections, strengthens his judgment, excites him to virtuous and usful actions, and makes him, in all respects, a beeter man.

The truth is that there is a great benefit to good and wholesome relationships with friends and family inour lives.  These relatioinships provide a loving accountability and constructive criticism that helpsus to grow and blossom into who God intended us to be. 

Sharpeing One Another!

I have heard said many times that our Faith as Christians is not an Individual endeavor, but a Communal Journey.  While it is true that we can follow Christ on our own and call ourselves Christians, it's equally true that being made in God's image, we were created to be relational beings.  We find our greatest fulfillment in life through relationships.  Jeus identified this fact in answering the Scribe who asked Him: in Matthew 22:36-40; "Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?"  He said to Him, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.  This is the greatest and first commandment."  And a second is like it: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."  Likewise, when we study and ponder God's wisdom together, we sharpen one another and come closer to a greater understanding of the application of God's loving wisdom in our lives.  When we Live in a void of life alone, there is always a possibility that without the loving balance of others, we will go off tangent in our understanding.

The truth is that, there is a great benefit to good and true wholesome relationships and constructive  criticism that helps us to grow and blossom into who God intened for us to be.      I have heard it best said this way: "Just as sharpening an iron blade makes it more effective, close friends help to sharpen our character.  My prayer for you is that you will wrap yourself in Jesus and surround yourself with with loving, wise friends and family who will encourage you in your journey with Jesus -- this journey that we call life.

Prayer to Surround Yourself With the Right People:

Abba-Father, Lord Jesus, Holy Spirit;

Please guide me to the appropriate friendships and honest relationships.  Allow true and loyal people to enter into my life who will walk beside me and help me to build my character and help me to improve my talents for my ccarrer, my ministry, and any othermuch -needed life skills and abilities.  Please Lord God, put me in touch with those kinds of people who can influence and guide me in the the correct direction.  Lord Jesus, I ask that You would send the right angels to help me to overcome struggles  and accomplish gereat things.  Allow Your angels to give me advice , guidance, hope, and inspiration that are right for me in the proper manner, so that I can go above and beyond.

Lord Jesus, as i enter into this new phase of building a New Close Inner-Circle of Christian Friends, I come before You with gratitude for the fresh opportunities that await me, especially the prospect of cultivatinfg new friendships.  Lord,  I know that You understand the importance of genuine--true friendship connections, and I seek Your guidance and blessing as I navigate through this exciting and challenging chapter of life.  Give me the courage to step beyond my comfort zone, the openess to embrace new experiences, and discernment to recognize kindred spirits along the way.  Lord, may Your Diivne Hand be at work, orchestrating meaningful--godly "Iron Sharpening Iron" encounters, that align with Your purposes for my life.

In Jesus' Mighty and Powerful Name I prayer, Amen.        

God Kows Us Inside and Out (Psalm 139:1-4); He is not deceived by appearance: (1 Samuel 16:7); He cannot Lie: (Titus 1:2); What God says about us in His Word is unvarnished , rock-solid fact.  In a world full of unceratinty, there is comfort and strength in knowing hte unchanging truth of whi we are in Christ Jesus.

We all want to know whoewe are and what we are capable of becoming.  We seek and search, and try to "Find Ourselves" through many different avenues.  many of us have even taken those Personality Yests and other Assessments.  And have even gone some Life Awareness Group to find our True Identity.  But as helpful as those things may sound, they are really not What or Who Defines You Are!  Have you ever stopped to ask, "What does God think about Me?  Who does He say that I am?"  In all my years as a Christ Follower [from the  time I was a young man, until now at the age of 65] I had never asked myself those questions quite this way until recently.  And what I found is that God has a lot to say about how He thinks about us--the Bible is full of God's description of us, His children.

WE ARE VALUABLE TO GOD:

God the Creator of all things, and we are His creation!  He breathed into our nosstrils the breath of life (Genesis 2:7);   "I created you in My own Image."  (Genesis 1:27); "So God created man in HIs own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female he created them."  (Psalm 139:16); "Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in Your book were wrtitten, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them."  (Psalm 139:13); "For You formed my inwaard parts; You knitted me together in my mother's womb."  (Matthew 10:30); "I know the number of hairs on your head, and before a word is on your tongue, I know it."  (Psalm 139:14);  "I praise You, for I am fearfully nd wonderfully made.  Wonderful are Your works; my soul knows it very well."

Have You Ever Truly STOPPED to ask: 'WHAT DOES GOD REALLY THINK ABOUT ME?  WHO DOES HE SAY THAT I AM?'

 WE ARE CREATED NEW IN JESUS:

God Crowned us with glory and honor as the pinnacle          and final act of the six days of creation.  In God's eyes, we   are Brand New Creatures in Jesus Christ.  Our Old Lives have passed away and our new life is right here -- right now.        In Jesus, we are no longer slaves to sin and the world,        and Alive in Christ.  Nothing or No One -- can ever separate us from God's Love and He will never leave us or forsake us; even when we feel like God isn't there; He is right there.      All we have to do is stop and reach up, and take hold of His hand and let Him walk with us and hold on to our hand.

• We have God's Spirit Living In Us Through Jesus:
• We Are A Reflection Of God's Love and the Character of Christ:

One thing we need to know for sure, is that we don't have to and really cannot or should not try to do this life by ourselves.  Ask God to surround you with those Close, True, Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends to help to walk through the Storms of Life.  Having those True and Loyal Friends walking with you, to help you to look to Jesus for your true identity.  Keep your eyes on Him.  He is the Author and Perfector of our faith.

THE ONLT OPINION THAT REALLY EVEN MATTERS ABOUT YOUR IDENTITY AND WHO YOU ARE, IS GOD'S OPINION!

YOU ARE NOT DEFINED BY ANYTHING THAT SOMEONE ELSE SAYS OR THINKS ABOUT YOU!

The book of Ephesians is packed full of truth about your Identity in Christ.  God knows you inside and out; (Psalm 139:1-4; "O LORD, You have searched me and known me!    You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern   my thoughts from afar.  You search out my path and my lying down and are aquainted with all my ways.  Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether." 

There are Yen Beautiful True Things God Says About Us:

 1:  I AM BELOVED:

Ephesians 2:4-5; "But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive in Christ even when we were dead in transgressions, it is by grace you have been saved."  God's love for us is the VERY reason that HE chose to save, rather than to leave to our own.  Even when we were dead in our sin, God loved us so much that He sacrificed His only begotten Son to bring us to new life.  You may feel rejected and despised, but the truth is, that you are dearly loved.

Ephesians 3:17-19; "so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith -- that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth, and length, and height, and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God."

Know this to be true; God does not merely tolerate us, like a family member you care about, with whom you would rather not spend too much time with.  God loves us deeply and passionately, and intimately.  His love for us is so vast that it can hardly be described ro even fully known.                 

Ephesians 5:1-2; "Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children.  And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."

 2:  I AM A MASTERPIECE:

Ephesians 2:10; "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, God prepared advance for us to do."  We were all create for a purpose.  God has good work for us all to do, and He custom-made each of us for that work.  It's awfully tempting to measure ourselves against the people around us or the images in the media, but that kind of comparison will always lead to discouragement.  None of us were made were made to be like anyone else.  We each were designed by the Creator of waterfalls, rainbows, sunrises    and sunsets, who is too talented an Artist to paint copies of the same thing over and over.  You may feel defective, but God handcrafted each of us just the way He wanted us to be.

Psalm 139:13-14; "For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother's womb.  I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful,     I know that full well.

 3:  I AM CHOSEN:

Ephesians 1:4; "For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world, to be holy and blameless in His sight."

What a thought!  Before the earth wss formed, God had already selected each of us.  He knew what each of our lives would look like; (Psalm 139:16); "Your eyes saw my unformed subsyance; in Your book were written, every on of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.  God knew what kind of person each of us  would be; (Jeremiah 1:5); "Before I formed you in the womb  I knew you, and before you were born, I consecrated you;      I appointed you a prophet to the nations."  God picked you!  You may feel rejected or overlooked, but the King of the universe has chosen you as His own!

1 Peter 2:9; "But you a chosen people, a royal priethood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light."            

 4:  I AM HOLY:

Ephesians 1:4; "For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight."

God did not chose us because He looked through time and saw that we would be holy.  The word "holy" means pure, set apart, sacred.  God knew that we would be sinful and entangled in the things of the world.  He chose us becaus eHe loved us and wanted to make us holy.

Colossians 1:21-22; "Once you were alinated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. But now He has reconciled you by Christ's physical body through death to present you holy in HIs sight, wothout blemish and free from accusation."

We are holy now, in the present tense, today.  You may feel hopeless or common, but inthis very moment , God proclaims holy, blameless and sacred.Colossians 3:12; Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience."  

 5:  I AM FORGIVEN:

Ephesians 1:7-10; "In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of trepasses, according to the riches of His grace, which He lavishes upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of His Will, according to His purpose, which He set forth in Christ as a plan for the fulness of time, to unite all things in Him, things in heaven and things on earth."

Hebrews 4:15; "For we do not have a highh priest who is unable to sympthize with our weaknesses, but one who in every reespect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin."

This is not surprising .  Jesus lived on earth the way He has throughout eternity.  Jesus has always been Holy, and always will be.  What is astonishing is that He traded His goodness for our sin; (2 Corinthinas 5:21); "For our sake He made Him to be sin who knew no sin, so that we might become the righteousness of God."  and Jesus suffered the death that we deserved. The Blameless One was publicly shamed, tortured, and then executed as a criminal!

Colosians 2:13-15; "And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumision of your flesh, God made alive together with Him, having foriven us all our trespasses, by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands.  This He set aside, nailing ti to the cross.  He disarmed the rulers and  authorities and put them to open shame, by triumphing over them in Him."

Jesus overcame the power of sin and death when he Rose Victoriously form the Grave!  Satan no longer has any claim on anyone who believes in and follows Jesus.   But Satan will relentlessly accuse you, shaming you with all your sins and failures in an attempt to dishearten and immobolize you to destroy your faith. But he is no longer your master, because your have made God the Father and Jesus Christ the Son your Master.  You no longer have to listen to anything Satan or his principalities have to say. 

Listen Only To The One True and Living God, who says that Jesus already paid for those sins.  They are gone, you (we) may feel shamed and dirty at times, but I can tell you that we (you) are washed and clean, fully reconciled to God through Jesus Christ.

Ephesians 5:25-27; "....Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the  washing with water through the Word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle, or any other blemish, but holy and blameless."        

WHO DOESN'T APPRECIATE TRUE AND LOYAL FRIENDS?

True Friends are a Great Gift, Loyal Friends are a Great Treasure, A True and Loyal Friendship takes work and time, just like any relationship.  For a Freindship that is balanced, you both have to put effort into the relationship. If it's a small group of True and Loyal Friends, they will all (hopefully like you) go out of their way to make those frindships [Rock Solid & Strong].

They will always try to encourage and inspire one another, even if someone in the group is really having a tough time feeling encouraged and inspired.  True Friends will laugh with you and cry with you, when you are sad and try their best to cheer you up when you're down, and gp out of their way to comfort you.  True Friends will always defend you when someone else attacks your character.  They will always be there No Matter What.  True--Honest and Loyal Friends don't sugar coat things, they tell us like it is.  Then honesty helps us to bonds together as True Friends.

TYrue--Honest--Loyal and Strong Friends  are like the family that we chose to be a part of in our Life:

• They ask , "How are you doing?" because they truly care about you:
• They are someone that you can be yourself with and will not judge you...No Fake Friends Allowed:
• They don't brag or glout; Instead they share their excitement and applaud yours.
• They Laugh at your jokes and laugh at theirs, even if they're lame.
• They are comfortable being around you, just as you are comfortable being around them, even in times of silence.
• They send you a Card, a Text, E-mail, instant Message, or a phone call, just to say, 'they feel your pain and hope you feel better and they mean it:
• They Encourage you  to get involved in your groups conversations.  True Friends want to hear what you have to say.  No One-Sided Conversations Allowed:
• True Friends will always try to bring out the best in you:
• Most True--Close Friends are closer to you than actual family members, because they are the family that you have chosen on an Intimate Level:
• Sometimes they can see our success even before we can and feel the pride that we do:
• They know the "REAL--GENUINE YOU; and still like you:
• They always with the best for you and want 'No Harm' to come to you:
• They Encourage and Motivate you, and they are there to help keep you strong, just the way that you are there for them:
• They Lift One Another Up and Never try todo anything to bring the others down:
• They usually know just the right thing to say at just the right time:
• True Friends have very huge shoulders and don't mind lending them out for you to lean on, and they are great free counselors, no matter what the issue is, they are there to listen to you vent if that's what's needed:

 A True--Close Friends will be brave enough and strong enough to tell you to chill and take a break, even if you don't want to hear it.  I could go on and on about wys to appreciate Your True-Close Friends, but the list would be endless and everyone has things that they are grateful for about their best friends. 

Do You have those Close--True and loyal Frineds that are closer to you than your own family members?  If so, then you have a Group of Friends that will always be there for you, even when your family won't or can't be there!  You Are Richly Bleesed!                           

This is about Building Strong--Honest--True and Loyal Friendship that will last a Life-Time:

Building Your True-Loyal and Strong Life Lasting Friendships That Stand The Storms Of Life:

Our Spiritual Journey to Wholeness in Life is done better with a few True--Strong--Honest and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends!  Crossing New Bridges along that journey with friends that will always be thereto Stand Beside You through the Good-Times as well as the Bad-Times, and accept you for who you are without judgment.  Those are the Best Kind of Friends to have in your corner!  I hope that God will help you to find those kinds of friends who will be there for life!

There is a Mental and Spiritual Sharpness that comes from being witht he right people.  And a meeting of the minds can help people see their ideas with new clarity, refine them and shape them into brilliant insights.  This usually requires friends who can Challenge One Another and Stimulate thought--people who focus on the idea without involving their egos in the discussion; people who know how to attack the Thought and not the Thinker. 

Two or more friends who bring the ideas together can hlep one another become sharper.  Thesame is true when two or more friends get together to share their faith, thei focus becomes stronger.  

Christian Character Is Very Critical: 

Who Is Your Counsel?  Consider Those Who Surround You Daily:

Consider those who are Sharpening You and Challenging you in every area of your life.  Who's holding you accountable to pursue your God-Given Goals?  Who'sholding you accountable to achieve your God-Given Purpose?  What Iron Sharpening Iron Relationships surround you daily that will help you to propel into yoru next level?  What Mentors are currently operating on your next level?

Your Inner-Circle; those who are closest to you, can either keep you stagnant and hold you back from pursuing your God-Given Destiny or they can Catapult you into your ne Dimension.  Surround yourself with purposeful, skilled , mature, and wise counsel.  Who's around you during ypoour most vulnerable and intimate times?  Who do you rely on to help you navigate through critical decisions?

Submit your thoughts to God and surround yourself with wise Christ-Centered Counsel.  Iron Sharpening Iron Realtionships will reveal yoru character and expose your level of maturity. 

Do you surround yourself with htose people who are stronger than your are spiritually?  Are you surrounding yoruself with those people who are wiser than you, or at least  seeking thos ewho's wisdom is the same as yours?  Are your surrounding yourself wiht those people who are more or equally skailled as you are?  Who's sharpening you in every area of life?  Iorn Sharpening Iro Relationships will strengthen yoru skill, your character and your maturity.  Who's investing time in you?  Who are you Sharpening?  Cinstructive efeedback is essential for the Construction of your next season in life.  Who are you Building it with?

ACTION:

Carefully Consider Those Who Surround You on a Daily Basis.  Pray and ask God for Strong, Honest, Loyal and Transparent, "Iron Sharpening Iron" Relationships.  Ask God to surround you with men or women who are full of Godly Wisdom, Counsel and Insight in every area of life.        

The Development of your Character, Shapes your Destiny.   

When God presents you with an opportunity that will enlarge your borders and expand your territory, it;s your responsibility to sreward the opportunity well.  god can present you with a God-Given, Life-Changing opportunity, but ot's your responsibility to sreward  that opportunity well.  Develop your character and sharpen yoru work ethics in this new seaon o your life.  Your ability to diligently execute and to active the development of your character, it's in your hands.  Whether you're in business, or innthe government, the military, media, education or in andy other arena, God wants tp give you thepromise, but it's up to you to steward the character of your heart, andthe diligent work of your hands.  Allow God to mold you into the man or woman the He called you to be. 

Execute consistently the character of Jesus that lives within you.  Surround yourself with other Godly Men and Women, whose hearts reflect the Character of Christ and of God the Father.  Iron Sharpening Iron Mentors and Relationships will help you to identify your own character flaws and help you to strengthen skill gaps that are essential for moving to the next level.  Character and Diligence are essential for the next level.  Choose not to connect with the ungodly--nonbeliever's. When you put your trust in Jesus, your character will sustain you.  When you link up with those without Godly Character, they can grow, but you keep your Character in tact. 

God wants us to connect with Him.  (Psalm 1:1) states this; "Blessed [happy, fortunate, prosperose and enabled] is the man who walks and lives not in the counsel of the ungodly [following their advice, their plans and purpose], or stands [submissive and inactive] in the path where sinners walk, nor sits down [to relax  and rest] where the scornful [and the mockers] gather."  Choose not to follow after after the advice, counsel, pattern, ways, and lifestyle of the ungodly.

ACTION:

Pray and ask god to surround you with those "Iron Sharpening Iron" Relationships that will Mature and Prune your unproductive areas in your life.  Ask God to help you to focus on the areas that need developing.

Psalm 1:1-2; "Blessed s the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seats of scoffers, But his delight is in the LORD, and on the His law meditate day and night."

The writer begins his psalm extolling the joys of obeying God and refusing to listen to those who discredit or redicule him.  Our friends and associates can have a profound influence on us, often in very subtle ways.  If we insist on friendships with those people who mock what God considers important, we might sin by becomeing indifferent to God's Will.  This attitude is the same thing as mocking!  And God will not be mocked! 

Do your friends build up tour faith or do they tear it down?  True Friends should help you to draw closer to God, not hinder you from having an intimate relationship with Him.

Those who diligently try to obey God's Will; will be blessed. They are like healthy fruit-bearing trees planted along the riverbank with strong roots, and God promises to watch over them.  In this life, we must have contact with unbelievers if we are to witness to them, but we must not join in or imitate their sinful behavior.  If you want dispair, spend time with peoplewho talk behind you back and mock God, if you want God's blessings, make friends with htose people who live for God and His Word.

Jeremiah 17:7-8; "But blessed are those who trust in the LORD and have made the Lord their hope, and confidence. They are like trees planted along side the riverbank, with roots that reach deep in th the water.  Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought.  Their leaves stay green, and they go right on producing delicious fruit."

Psalm 34:8; "Taste and see that the Lord is good.  Oh, the joys of those who trust Him!"

Psalm 84:11-12; "For the Lord God is our light and protector.  he gives us grace and glory.  No good thing does the Lord withhold for m those who do what is right.  O, Lord Almighty, happy are those who trust in You."

God doesn't promise to give us everything that we think is good, but He will not withhold what is permanrntly good.  he will give us the means to walkalong His paths, but we must do the walking.  When we obey Him, He will not holld anything back that will help us to serve Him.  Surrounding ourselves with Godly men and women who are looking for the same thing that we are looking for; An "Iron Sharpening Iron" Relationship with True friends.            

A Deeper Spiritual Life cannot Be Developed and cannot Grow Without a Deeper Devotion to God's Word and Prayer: The best way to groe deeper and stronger i yoru faith, you must surround yourself with Strong, True, and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends.  Buuilding a deeper Spiritual Life along with Building Strong Lasting Relationships with those friends taht you have allowed to be part of your Inner-Circle of Life, can help you walk and standfirm in your faith.

A daily Scripture selection along with a Daily Devotional deepens your insight, while honest and open-hearted prayer helps you to focus your devotionals and you prayer prompted through scripture inspires the application of your Devotion and God's Word to every area of your life.  Ask the Holy Spirit to help you to sense God Listening to you, Ask Him to help you to develop a deeper hunger for God.  If your prayers seem to be ineffective, you can strengthen them to experience more and more of God's Power when you pray.  Ask God to help you to want Him more than anything else or more than anyone else in your life.  When youhunger for more of God, you will naturally be motivated to meet with Him early each day, just as Jesus did.  When you seek intimacy with God, be willing to make being closer to God your top priority. 

Make whatever changes you need to make in yoru life to allow yourself to spend significant time with God daily in prayer, and regularly confess and repent of any sin that may block yoru intimacy with God.  Deliberately build the rest of yoru life around yoru relationship with God, and allowing those "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends that you have in your life to keep you accountable, so that you will be able to pursue God with passion.  When you pursue God with passion, you will overcome complacency and distractions that can cause you to cut back on how much time you spend in prayer.  Whenever you encounter challenges (and you will), view them s opportunities to pray and to discover more about God's plan for you.  Ask God to give you a passion for the people and the situations that burn in His heart, so that you can pray with passion for what matters most to God.           

How To Create Strong "Irorn Sharpening Iron" Relationships:  You know; it's really no secret that other people influence our lives.  But we have the choice as to whom we allow to influence our lives.  No one can or even has the Right or Authority to force their way of 'Thinking -- Believing or Living on you!  I have had only a few Relationships -- Friendships in my life that wrere True and Loyal Friendships.  All human relationships will be strained and tested, but it's how we come to one another's side and determines how strong those friendships will be.  We can't control the way others are going to react, but we can learn to react in the Character of Christ. {the Character of Godliness}.  I can definitely tell you from my own experience, that God will allow you to be in a difficult relationship sometimes to stretch you, challenge you, rub you the wrong way and test you to see where your loyalties stand, because He is working something out in your life that could not be worked any other way.  But He will never allow you to stay in a relationship that will bring you harm.  

The Truth is -- Building Strong Loyal Relationships that will develop into True--Honest--Strong and Loyal Friendships, will change us.  Try this; reflect on a relationship that you ahve with a close friend and think about how you have changed as a result of that relationship.  Hopefully that frindship has changed for the better in many ways.  The things is, relationships are often complicated and unpredictable -- solid and stable one day, and then chaotic and frustrating the next day.  Every day we interact with many different people, build different types of relationships, and in some instances, we even end up with friends that we can start to build long lasting--Rock Solid Relationships with.

Some people today may try ro go it alone and say that they really need anyone!  Or maybe they have made that choice because of deep--hurtful betrayal.  But, I can tell you from experience that can be the case, when you have been betrayed by someone that you trusted whole-heartedly, then letting anyone or too many people get too close to you is very hard, much less even trusting anyone becomes hard.  We all need someone or maybe two or three really True and Loyal Friends, that will stand with you through thick and thin.

In (Ecclesiastes 4:7-12); we learn about the tragedy of not having friends.  Scripture shows us that people with companions have someone who can lift them up when they fall or are feeling down, and teams of several people are harder to defeat, than just a lone person trying to make it on their own.  God's Word tells us that Friendships are a part of what makes life worth living.  Jesus encourages us to pursue True and Loyal frindships, but also knows that they can be complicated and disappointed at times.  (Proverbs 20:6); "Many will say they are loyal friends, but who can find who is truly reliable?" 

Since there are no perfect people to be friends with, even the best advice in the world does not guarantee perfect human friendships.  Everyone has their own guidelines for what they consider for building those True Rock-Solid, Strong and Loyal Friendships.  I believe that when we are looking to build Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendships, we first need to ask God to help us to find those types of people, and allow the Holy Spirit to guide us to those people.  Growing alongside other True Christ Followers who are seeking to build Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendships, makes us better, stronger, more reliable and more resiliant.  true--Strong and Loyal Friends can bring out the best in us.  The best way to Create Strong and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendships, is to first learn to be a friend worth having.           

Sharpening One Another in True Friendship:

No two persons are exactly alike.  That means that no friends will have the same way of relating to one another.  Some we can trust to help us with certain tasks that other friends will not even assist us in completely.  We amy have some close friends who will never say a critical word about us, or doubt anythign that we have done or ahve spoken.  If we are fortunate enough to have such friends and we have at least one or two close friends who will be  honest with us and offer only needed criticism that will help us to improve ourselves and sharpen our walk with Jesus.  (Proverbs 27:17); talks about sucha friend, it likens the interaction between two faithful friends who are seeking the improvement of one another to the sharpens with an Iron Sharpening Stone, or anothe rIron Tool against an Iron Sharpener.

The Anthology is is even clearer in the Hebrew for the second half of that verse, can be translated as this, "One man sharpens the character of another man."  Just as a man might sharpen iron in order to make it suitable for combat, so does a faithful friend equip hus friend for success by constructive godly criticism.  Giving a tool the desired sharpeness or other in the ancient world, as there were no electric whetsones or other sharpness devices.  Presistent, careful striking of the tool against a sharpening stone was required, and the process lasted longer than a matter of seconds. 

The Preoverb is underscoring the importance of persistence in friendship.  One man does not sharpen another man with one's speech or dialogue, though words spoken in the right seasn can go quite far in helping to improve another person.  Instead, people sharpen one another over time, through years of friendship and all of the ins and outs, and the ups and downs that come with enduring relationships.  A truly constructive friend is faithful over time to offer his or her counsel, criticism and instruction, and they do not give up the first time that their friend fails to heed their advice. Personal and Spiritual Growth is a Communal Affair, as scripture reminds us in various ways. In the beginning, God did not just create one human being -- but He created two, because He saw that it was not good for anyone to be alone and try to make it on their ownin this world.  We all need others in our lives to sharpen us and to encourage us in all that we do in this journey called life.  We need Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Relationships with those friends that will stand with us through thick and thin--No Matter What!

Do you have those Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends in your life right now, who help you in sharpening your character?  We are blessed indeeed, if we have at least one or two truly close friends that we can count on for loving -- godly constructuve criticism.  If we do not have any such people in our life, we should be looking for them.  We need to look for every opportunity to seek out those people who have the same focus for building Strong--Honest and Loyal "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendship.  We should also be asking God to help us into the people who can offer such friendship to others and to enable us to persist in love toward our friends and others around us.

Ask yourself this question: What kind of freind I am to those taht I have built a Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendships and Relatonships with?  There is a vast difference between knowing and being a close and true friend.  The greatest eveidence of genuine friendship, is Loyalty, being available to help in times of distress or personal struggle.  Too many people are just Fair-weather Friends, they say that they will stand by you no matter what and be available any time, that is until things start to really heat up, they stick around as long as the friendship is helping them to get what they want out of it, and they just ignore you, or they just bail out when they have to stand and deliver what they claim they will.  Think of your friends and make an assessment of both--your loyalty to them and their loyalty to you.  Are those relationships really Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friendships. are there some holes that seem to be opening up?  Only time can show just how solid a friendship it truly is.         

Day-In and Day-Out, we are always around people .  Some people we may like or love,  and some people we may despise.  But, we still have to fid some way to get along with them.  These days, it's really hard to find those friends that are truly loyal.  I mean, those kinds of friends that are always there "No Matter What -- No Matter When" and will always make an effort to check in on you just to see how you're doing. 

When I was in the Military, I was always surrounded by those kinds of friends, I had formed Close, Trusting and Loyal Relationships with them and we each knew that we could always count on one another.  Good and Loyal Friends are few and far between , If you have only a few true and loyal friends throughout your lifetime, you are truly blessed.  True friends that care about you and want you to succeed in life aren't always going to see eye-to-eye with you on everything, you might even fight or get angry with one another, and say things that might hurt one another, but not really mean to hurt each other.  But true friends would never intentionally mentally, emotionally or physically hurt one another, but if they do hurt you or cause you pain, they will always make an effort to make things better. 

Sometimes they may be right and you have to make the effort to makes things right and let them know how you were the one that was wrong: most timesthey will respect you that much more for admitting that you were wrong, and that you want to move forward and go on with the friendship that you have with them.  The ones that you don't want to surround yourself with, are the ones that go out of their way to hurt you and who have absolutely no respect for you.  They will blame you for everything that has happen, andnever accept the fact that they were the ones who are wrong.  And you should see everything thei way.  The one hurtful thing about all of this, is thhat some of these people may even be family members or even people in your church, people that you thought you could or at least be able to trust.

These people are the very kinid of people that you do not want to ever form any long-lasting relationships with, and any of them in fact are family or church members, them it will be even harder to sever those relationships.  But, in the long run it may be best to just bramch away from them and just pray for them, because neither you or anyone else wants to be around someone who has the ability bring you down (you will know in your heart) if you should just sever  a relationship with someone, because like I said before, True Friends don't always see Eye-to-Eye, but they will always try to find a peaceful solution.

The point that I am trying to make here is, to surround yourself with Good and Honest People who truly care for you, care about you, and want to see the best for you, because they know that you will stand beside just as well.  These kinds of people are the ones tht you know that you know can trust to always be there whenever you need them and the ones that can help you throughout your hardships.  Ask God to help you to surround yourself with those True--Loyal--Strong "Iron Sharpening Iron" Freisnds that you can build Life-Long "Rock Solid" Relationships with.  And He will bring those People into your life.          

Confessions Of A Man Chasing God's Own Heart:

I have a confession to make; it's really hard these days to be a Strong Godly Man, and I am sure it's just as hard to be a Strong Godly Woman as well.  Most of the things God says about men and women in the Bible apply to both, no matter which is being addressed.  And when God gets tot he point about how we (men) are to live, He is often tailoring a meassge toward our weaknesses.  Surrounding ourselves with Strong --Godly "Iron Sharpening Iron" Friends and Building Strong--True--Hinest and Loyal Relationships, is one of the best ways that I can think of to help men and women to grow and sharpen their character to reflect the Character of Jesus.

With all that has been going on this past year , I admit that it has really been hard to find those True and Loyal People, especially Godly Men, to partner with to help me to walk through all this craziness and not lose touch of who I am in Christ.  I know that if we can surround ourselves with good and honest Christian men and womenm this journey that we are walking through these uncertain times, will seem less threatening.  With such things as betrayal, from friends, family members, roommates, neighbors, church members,  co-workers, and our government officials and so-called leaders.  As well as Civil Unrest and Violence over stuff that really has no place in this country, there are days that I have a really hard time trying to figure out how I can make it through each week trusting God, on my own, with no one willing to stand next to me and walk with me, to keep me focused on God and His Goodness.  I don't mean that I think that God has forgotten us, or abandoned us, or si untrustworthy.  It's just that it's really hard to keep complete focus when there is no one who is man enough to walk next to someone that they call a 'brother in Christ', so that he doesn't have to face each day on his own strength.  I just wanted to share that with you!  And ask you!  Do you feel or have you ever felt like you are left all alone to walk through all this by yourself--because everyone is more concerned about themselves and you just don't matter?            

Every Sunday Millions of people file into building, sit in rows of seats and listen to someone talk about God.  Some of the buildings resemble an ornate place or a shrine, while others are barely held together. 

What Is Your Christian Identity?

Is it tied to the where you attend church?  Are you simply Identified as a True Servant to others; or both?  Naturally, you can't answer that question yourself, or you might be seen as Biased or Self-centered.  What do other people think of your Faith?  How do they Identify and Define You?

First---Let me tell you that, it doesn't matter what the world thinks or what the world says that Defines you.  It only matters what God Thinks and Says you are that Defines You!  We are instructed in Hebrews to not "Forsake the gathering of ourselves with others for the edification of the body of Christ."  I believe we are to gather and whorship God with others---it's part of our role as Christians.  However, if our gathering is the only way we can identify our our faith; we as men are screwed.

Consider this, Rotarty Clubs and Men's Social Clubs also meet weekly, do good deeds, form communities, and serve others.  Again I ask---What Is Your Christians Identity?

The world doesn't need millions of Christian men hiding inside a building for a few hours a week, the world is waiting on God to show up at their doorstep!  And guess what ---Men Of God, you may be the only living representation of Jesus Christ in the world, that most people might see on any given day.

Yes there are churches that do good work in their communities, spare the denates about all those things your church is doing.  The real question is; "How are you going to Represent Christ to the world around you every day?

Personal Identity is one of the most important things to understand about ourselves as Men.  KNow who we are, what makes us tick, what makes us laugh, what really gets on our nerves, what brings us true joy; those are essential things just to name a few, because that understanding---affects everything else.  Personal Identity affects how we deal with conflicts, and even who we choose as friends. 

If I were to ask you, "Who are You?" Would you respond with your name, age, grade, your lifestyle, your heritage, or your hobblies, or maybe the state you grew up in?  All of these are external things, they may be a part of who you are, but they aren't permanent, they be facts about you, but they are not who you are!

Your Secret Identity:

If you ahve accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior; you have a secret identity that you may not know of or be aware of.  Can you see it?  Do you know it?  Or have you lost sight of who you really are?  Have you forgotten who lives in your heart?

Your Identity in Christ doesn't depend on your hair color, body type, or which lunch table you sit at.  Have you allowed other people to define you?  To tell you who you are and who your aren't?  God has already defined you in His perfect Son, Jesus Christ.  But we forget that identity sometimes.  It's so secret that we end up chasing after meaningless earthy possessions and sinful experiences to find ourselves, try to fit in, or try to be cool.  To try and be someone that we're not.  Your True Identity hides somewhere much more precious than things and experiences.  And that Identity is Exrenal. 

[NOTW]---Not Of This World:

If you are a Follower of Jesus Christ, you're no longer a part of this world soaked in sin.  (Galatians 2:20) says; "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ who lives in me.  This life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me."       (2 Coritnians 5:17); "Therefore, if any one is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old has passed away; behold the new has come." 

Why do we as men, who have been called out by our Heavenly Father, try so hard to fit in and get approval from a world that we are no longer a part of?  We will never get their complete approval because here's the hard truth: If you have decided to follow Jesus with all of your heart, you're never going to completely "Fit-In."

But the world's approval doesn't matter.  We have a Heavenly Father who loves us more than anyone on this earth ever could.  And HIs love for us doesn't change.  It never fails, and it's eternal.  That's worth giving up the fight to get a seat at the popular table, Right?

Our Identity in Christ---14-Things God Says of Us: Who we are and what defines us!  What is your identity?  That's a question many people struggle to answer.  Too often, people base their identitiies on what they do (from their jobs to their roles in relationships), defining themselves by those pursuits.  But by doing so, they significantly limit their identity in Christ. 

If you're a Christ Follower, your identitiy encompasses all the abundance of being a beloved child of God.  Here's how you can start living your life fully in Christ.  Use this list of things God calls you and how He Identifies you to remind yourself who you are in Christ Jesus.

1. You Are All Saints: The fact that you've placed your trust in Jesus Christ is enough to qualify you as a Saint.  Even though you'll struggle with sin while you live in this fallen world, your core identity as a Christian is as a Saint, not a sinner---and you can always count on Jesus' help to overcome sin in your life.  Rely on His help to resist temptation.  When you do sin, confess and repent immediately.  Maintain attitudes of humility and gratitude for God's Grace.  (Ephesians 2:19); "Nowtherefore you are no longer strangers and foreigners, but fellow citizens with the saints, and the household of God."  (Colossians 1:11-13); "being strengthened with all power according to His glorious might, so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks tot he Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saint in light.  He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the Kingdom of His beloved Son [Jesus]."  (Romans 8:27); "And He who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spitit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God."  (Ephesians 3:17); "That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith, and that you being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height."
2. You Are Blessed: Who has given you the greatest blessing of all Himself.  No matter what otherr blessings God may or may not choose to send into your life, you can always be confident that God Himself will be with you, loving you, and working everything in your life out for good purposes when you trust Him to do so.  God also brings many different and specific blessings into your life regularly.  Make a habit of reflecting on those blessings every day; every week, and thanking HIm for them.  (Psalm 1:1-3); "Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand with in the way of sinners or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on His law day and night.  That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither, whatever they do prospers. (2 Corinthians 9:8); "And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things, that you need, you will abound in every good work."  No matter what season of life you are going through, God continues to shower you with blessings.
3. You Are Appreciated: God Notices and Appreciates every good choice you make thoughout your life---even when others don't.  So change the way you live as a result.  Exchange grumbling for praying, competing for celebrating, bitterness for thankfulness, performing for serving and boasting for emcouraging.  (1 John 3:1); "Searching what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!"  (Zephaniah 3:17); "The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves.  He will take take great delight in you; in HIs love He will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing."
4. You Are Saved: Thanks to Jesus' sacrifice on the cross, you're saved from sin, Satan, your old human nature, and a pattern of worldly living.  You can respond in gratitude to your salvation by doing good works that God has prepared for you to do, to help others discover relationships with Him and help redeem this fallen world.  (Romans 10:9-10); "If you declare with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.  For it is with your heart that you believe and are justifed, and it is wiht your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved."  (2 Corinthians 5:21); "God made Him who had no sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God."  (John 5:24); "Very truly I tell you, whoever hers My words and believes Him who sent Me has eternal life and will not be judged, but has crossed over from death to life."            
5. You Are Reconciled: Jesus has spiritually reconciled you to God and other believers.  Since God plans for all Christians -- from all the diverse types of backgrounds on Earth -- to live harmoniously together in heaven forever, you should do yoru best to live harmoniously in the here and now.  Ask the Holy Spirit to help you to be peaceful, humble, and to be more compassionate toward other people.  (Romans 5:10-11); "for if, while we were still God's enemies, we were reconciled to Him through the death of His Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through His life!  Not Not only is this so, but we also boast in our Lord, Jesus Christ, through whoom we have now received reconciliation."  (Coloassians 3:13); "Bear with each other and forgive one another, if any has a grievance against someone.  Forgive as the Lord forgave you."  (Ephesians 4:32); "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as God forgave you." 
6. You Are Heard: God hears you and responds to your prayers when you're connected to Him through Jesus Christ, but that response may also be silence!  Feel free to confidently express any of your thoughts and feelings to God at any time, expected Him to listen to you and to answer your prayers according to what's best for you.  (Jeremiah 29:12-13); "Then you will call on Me and come and pray to Me, and I will all your heart.  You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart."  (1 Peter 3:12); "For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and His ears are attenteive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."  (1 John 5:15); "And if we know that He hears us--whatever we ask--we know  that we have what we asked of Him."
7. You Are Gifted: God ahs given you special abilities that He wants you to use in the Christian ministry work He calls you to do--both inside your church and out i the community.  You can discover those gifts by asking yourself questions like: "In What or Where do you have a passion to serve?"  "What do you have a burden to do?" "What opportunities has God already provided for you to serve others?"  "What things are you best at and have the most success in?"  "What have godly people commended you for doing?"  and "What acts of service have given you the deepest sense of satisfaction?"  (Ephesians 2:10); "For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared for us in advance to do."  (1 Peter 4:10-11); "Each of you should use whatever gift you ahve received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God's grace in the various forms.  If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God.  If anyone serves, they should dos o with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ.  To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen."  (Romans 12:4-8); "For just as each of us has a body with many members, and these members do not have the same function, so in Christ we, through many, form one body, and each emmber belongs to all the others.  We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each ofus, if your gift is prophesying, them prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it's teaching, then teach; if it's to encourage, then give encouragement; if it's giving, then give generously; if it's to lead, do it diligently; if it's to show mercy, do it cheerfully."
8. You Are A New Creation: Jesus Placed a New Spirit within you when you began a relationship with Him, so at yoru core, you are a Newer and Different Person than you were before you became a Christian. However, you'll keep learningand growing every day for the rest of your life as you gradually become more like Jesus.  It doesn't matter how old you are, as long as you are diligently seeking God daily, and seeking to be more like Jesus; you will keep learning through the Holy Spirit how to live and reflect the Character of Jesus in your life and to the people around you!  (2 Corinthians 5:17); "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here."  (1 Peter 1:3); "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.  In HIs great mercy He has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jeus Christ from the dead."  (Ephesians 4:22-24); "You were taught, wiht regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made a new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness."
9. You Are Fogiven: Since Jesus paid the price that God's Jutice Demanded for our sin and took od's Wrath for us all upon Himself, you were forgiven for all of your sins (past--present--future), when you placed your trust in Jesus.  You can thank Jesus for forgiving you by obeying His Commands to forgive others who have harmed you and to seek forgiveness from people you've harmed.  (Ephesians 4:32); "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving other, just as in Christ God forgave you."  (1 John 1:9); "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and  will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."  (Psalm 103:11-12); "For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His love for those who fear Him; as afar as the east is from the west, so far He removed our transgressions from us."
10. You Are Adopted Into God's Family: As a Christaian, you've been adopted into God's Family.  The work of your Big Brother--(Jesus)--on the cross has made it possible for you to become one of the sons and daughters of God the Father.  So make it your main goal of life, learning how to know, and trust God as your Father.(Romans 8:15-17); "The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received, brought about your adoption to sonship.  And by Him we cry, "Abba-Father."  The Spirit Himself testifies with our spieit that we are God's children.  Now if we are children, then we are heirs---heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in His sufferings in order that we may also share in His glory."  (galasians 3:26-29); "So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized in Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ.  There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there any male or female,, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.  If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise."  (Ephesians 1:4-5); "For He chose us in Him before the creatiom of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight.  In love He predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His Pleasure and Will."
11. You Are Loved: While people who love you cam\n't dos o completely unselfishly, contiually, or even perfectly.  God does!  As a Christian, nothing can ever separate you from God's Great Love for you.  (Romans 8:37-39); "In all these things we are more than conquerers through Him who loves us.  For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither height nor depth. nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."  (1 John 4:7-11); "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God.  Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.  Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.  This is how God showed His love among us: He sent His One and Only (begotten) Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."
12. You Are Victorious: Jesus has given you the power to Ultimately Overcome Evil, Sin and Death.  Yes hte spiritual weapons at your disposal as a Christian (truth, righteousness, the gospel, faith, salvation, scripture, prayer, and the strengthto stand) in spiritual batteries, trusting that you can always emerge victorious.  (1John 5:4); "for everyone born of God overcome the world.  This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith."  (John 16:33); "I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have peace.  In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart I have overcome the world."  (1 Corinthians 15:55-57); "Where, O death, is your victory?  Where is your sting? The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.  But thanks be to God!  He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ."                                

FIVE BIBLICAL PRIORITIES OF A CHRISTIAN MAN:

Many Young Christian Men and some Older Christian Men struggle with knowing what things in life should be most important to them in their Faith Journey.  What should your Priorities as a Christian Man Be?  Even if you think you know what God says your priorities should be---how do you order your priorities as a Godly man?

What Is A Priority?

A Priority is something that is truly important to us,  something that we care about, then we will show that by our deeds.  For instance, God's Word tells us that if our faith is truly important to us, we will demonstrate that in our works, not just our words, but also in our actions!  

(James 2:15-18) says; "If a brother or sister is poorly clothed, lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, "Go in peace, be warmed, and filled," without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that?  So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.  But someone will say, "You have faith and I have works."  Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works."

Thankfully God has not left us to ourselves as men, but He has given us His Words as a guide for our lives.  Unless a man is called to a life of celiabcy i full time service to God, the scriptures show us that every man has been given Five areas of Priority by God.

The Five Priorities that God gives to Christian Men are; (God--Family--Work--Country and Church):

Priority--#-1: GOD (putting Him First above all, every day):  Gods Word tells us plainly that serving Him and His Plan, and Design for our life should be our first priority:

(Matthew 6:33); "But seek first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness; and all these things will be added unto you."

(Matthew 10:37); "Whoever loves their father and mother more than Me is not worthy of Me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me."

(Acts 5:29); "But Peter and the aostles answered, W must obey God rather than man."

Serving God comes before every other consideration in our life, including ourselves, our family, our church, our employer, or our community, and our country.  But part of what of what it means to serve God is taking care of the needs of our family, ourselves, our church, our community, and even our country if we are able. 

Priority--#-2: Family:

If God has not granted a man the gift of celibacy for full-time service to His Kingdom as He didwith the Apostle Paul and other men and women, then a husband's second priority after God becomes his wife and family.  But what if a man does not want a family or a wife?  Many people have asked the question, "What if a man is not called to full-time Christian Service, can't he just opt not to get married, but to pursue a Single Life?" 

First-Off, let's define "Full-Time Christian Service".  Often we think of full-time as someone being a Pastor. or Missionary, or Christian School Teacher.  But But there are many single people who work in their secular work force during the week, and are constantly working at the church or volumteering for anything that needs to be done.  They dedicate the vast majority of their free time to God's service since they don't have families to attend to. 

I have also heard it said by people who think that they are so righteous, and say they believe that some men go against go against God's design for marriage if and when they choose not to marry and have a family in order to purposefully avoid the responsibilies of having a family and that they just want to live for themselves.

But, while it might be true for some men and women, it most certainly 'Is Not' true for all who choose not to marry.

I believe, that since God gave us all "Free Choice" and we make a decision to remain single; there amy be underlying resons why that choice was made.  Although, God doesn't desire for anyone to be alone or to walk through this life by ourselves.  I don't believe that God will withhold His Blessings from those of us who choose to remain single.   

(1 Corinthians 7:7-9); "I wish that all were as I myself am.  But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.  To the unmarried and the widows, I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am.  But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry.  For it is better to matty than to burn with passion."  (1 Corointhians 7:32); "But I want you to be free from concern.  One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord."

Paul is saying that what Jesus was saying, is that if we are married, we have a solemn obligation to care for our family and to take care of their needs.  And being married, he has the responsibility to lead his family in serving God.

If a man or a woman is single then they are free to care for others and serve in his or her church without having the resonsibilities of a family.  BUt as long as they are living a single life, they still have a responsibility for taking care of themselves and managing their homes.  This is clear from the Scriptures---while God is always our first priority.  God Himself tells us that famly is our second priority; before all other considerations---even the Church.

(Ephesians 5:25 & 28-29); "Husbands Love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it;.....So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies.  He that loves his wife loves himself.  For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes it, even as the Lord loves the church."

We as Christian Men, are to feed and take care of the physical needs of our families and care for our own bodies. So when all things are equal, while our families come second to God---they are to be our First Priority amongst our second to God, they are to be our first priority amongst our community. our relatives, our career, and our friends.  But, I want you to notice One "Key Phrase" here, "When All Things Are Equal."

In (1 Timothy 5:4-8); hte Apostle paul tells us that the first way we put our faith in practice iis in our home!The needs of our (wives) if we are married; family come only after our service to God and then the needs of our children if we are single parents or widowed.  But the needs of our children come before other priorities, like our career, pur community and our church.  In Truth---part of what it means to serve God is to serve the needs of our family.  As fathers, we have a  responsibility to care for the physical and spiritual needs of our children.  In the same way that marriage is to be a model of the relationship between God and His people, so too the father/child relationship is another model of the relatioinship between our Heavenly Father as His children.  We as fathers are not to discourage our children or needlessly anger them, but we are to bless them, exhort them, comfort them, encourage them, discipline them, teach them in the ways of God and love them as God loves His children.    

Priority--#-3: Work--Career [Providing for Your Family and for Your Household]:

God's Word tells us as men that we were created to be workers.  Our minds and our bodies as men are specifically built for work.  Some of us men are built forphysically based labor, while others are built for more intellectually based labor.  But, no matter what our talents and abilities may be, we as men are built for work.

(Genesis 3:15); "And the Lord God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and keep it."

God designed and built man for work and the first thing He did after creating him, was to assign him to work and keep the Garden of Eden.  The scriptures tell us that as Men of God, we ought to dedicate ourselves to our work and find joy in our labor. 

(Ecclesiates 9:7-10); "Go, eat your bread with joy, and drink oyur wine with a merry heart, for God has already approved what you do.  Let your garments be always white.  Let not oil be lacking on your head.  Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of yoru vain life, that He has given you under the sun.  Whatever your hand find to do, do it with your might, for there is no work or thought or knowledge or wisdom in Sheol, to which your are going."

(Psalm 90:17); "let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands upon us; yes, establish the work of our hands!"  (Colossians 3:23); "And whatever you do, work heartily as for the Lord and not for men."

Men---Work is not an Option for Us: The World is literally ours to Command: When we farm, when we fish, when we build and when we organize in all our conquests, wharever they may be, this is what God built men to desire to strive for and to do.  The first question that most men ask one another when they meet for the first time is: "What Do You Do?"

Most Men Identify themselves by their work, their title or career.  Most men are born for adventure, for hard and skill work, or designing and building things.  From Boyhood  there is something in a male that makes him want adventure and conquest as a part of his life.  He wants to go into the wild and hunt, or into a field somewhere to work in some way. 

I know that all most of us "Christian Men" have struggles with different sins or issues in our daily lives, some more than others.  I also know that it grieves the Heart of God every time a parent drops their son off at some daycare for someone else to teach and take care of them.  Just as it also grieves the Heart of God for an able bodied man who can work to provide for his family, not to work or even try to work.  That goes against the very core of man's design when he doesn't even try to work.  

Priority--#-4: The Church:

So, up until now we have established that Biblically Speaking, God is our First Priority and our family is our Second Priority.  While service to God does not always equal service to the church---sometimes it does.  God calls us to serve our families as we have discussed.  Sometimes there are other ways that we can use our God-Given Priorities to make excuses for neglecting to priority of of service to god's Kingdom.  While we all may serve in our church in different ways, tha call to serve is for every believer in Christ.  But that also doesn't mean that everyone is bound to service in their church, simply because there is no mandate that everyone is to serve as a Staff Team Member or even a volunteer.  And 'no one', not even the Pastor has the right to force or guilt, or make threats to those who are eother not called to serve or for whatever reason choose not to serve.  That is only between God and the person.  But if God puts the opportunity to serve in your life, then you should make the best of those opportunities to serve and make them a priority as well. 

(1 Coronthians 12:4-6, 12 & 27); :Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit.  And there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of of activities, but the same God who empowers them all in everyone."....."For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ."......"Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it."

(Ephesiains 3:21); "to Him be the glory in the curch, and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever."

(Hebrews 10:23-25); :Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering , for He who promises is faithful.  And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and do good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one anothe, and all the more as you see the day drawing near."

Scriptures are clear that God wants us to make church and the local community and fellowship with other believers a priority for ourselves and for our families and Men of God.  But that doesn't mean you have to be involved in everything in your church or community.  For some of us it may be no more than bringing our families faithfully to fellowship services each week to worship God and hear the teaching of His Word and to fellowship with other believers in Christ.  For others it may go beyond that in making themselves available to help others in their community, around their city, around their state, around their country, or even arounf the world.  We all have different callings, different gifts and different resources availble.  But regargless of these differences---we are all called to to make the Church of Christ Jesus a priority in our lives.  (Galatians 6:10) says; "As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good to all men, especially to those who are of the household of faith."

Priority--#--5: Country:

Despite the beliefs of some Christians, God saya there is a Time for War.  (Ecclesiastes 3:8); "A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace." 

(Exodus 15:3); "The Lord is a man of war, the Lord is His name."  (Proverbs 20:18); "Every purpose is established by counsel; and with good advice make war."

(Nehemiah 4:14); "And I looked, and rose up, and said to the nobles, and to the rulers, and to the rest of the people, Be not afraid of them; remember the Lord, which is great and terrible, and fight for your brethren, your sons, and your daughters, your wives and your houses."  God has given menin general the ability to wage war and some men He gave a special ability in this area as He did with King David.

(Psalm 144:1); "Blessed be the Lord my strength which trains my hands for war and my fingers to fight."

This is why some men are simply called to be soldiers like King David was.  This "Warrior Spirit" is something that should never be discouraged in young men.  Rather it should be encouraged and channeled in positive ways.  Other men while not being called to be soldiers, may still have this "Warrior Spirit" which calls them into 'Law Enforcement, First Respnders, or Fire Fighter' again, this is somethinig that we should be encouraging when we see this in our young men. 

Some are called to lead their communities, their cities, their states, and even their countries.  Countries need these types of men in order to maintain peaceful and orderly societies.  But all of us men even if we  don't have the "Warrior Spirit" or the drive to serve in Public Office should be willing to answer the call to defend our country.  During times of peace, our service may be limited to voting--which is something that all Christians are encouraged to do, but is not a mandate and cannot be forced.  In times of crisis it might mean we are called to go to war to defend our nation.  If there is a natural disaster that strikes our community, then we as men should be the first ones to step up and assist in our communities.                 

  CONCLUSION:

We have been shown in scripture that God has given Christian Men the Five Priorities of a godly Man.  "God, Family, Work, Church and Country."  The first feat is just figuring out what our priorities should be--and what God wants our priorities to be.  But for many men, the larger feat is figuring out how to order or how juggle these priorities that God has given us as Christian Men. 

A Christian Man Is Truthfull:

The Lord says in (Isiaih 29:13); "These peoplecome near to Me with their mouth and honor Me with their lips, but their hearts are far from Me.  Their worship of Me is based on merely human rules they have been taught."

If our faith consists simply of talking about God with no evidence of following Him or His Commands, we are nothing more than an empty puff of air.  Poutinely attending church, going through the motions of rituals, and demonstrating no real evidence of Christ in our life, is weak and ineffective.

God cared enough to help us retain our hearts by giving us an example of sacrificial love through Christ Jesus.  We choose to worship God because we love Him.  If we spend more time convincing people with our lips that God is first in our lips that God is first in our life rather than demonstrating our obedience to Him, perhaps we should make a few modifications.

If a stranger to God (a non-Christian) watches us and our proclamations of faith only to see a Sunday-Morning Saint and a Week-Day Hellion, then why would they want to bother getting to know God?  Christian Men are Bold enough to "Walk The Walk" not just "Talk The Walk"!  Never Caught in Just Lip Service!

THE RIGHT -- NEXT STEP:

What 3-5 Words would you use to describe God to an "Unbeliever" and What 10-Words would you use to describe your relationship with God to someone?

PRAY: Father God, I want to be the man who Reflects Your Love from the inside-out.  Give me the stength to live with Charater that comes from knowing You.  In Jesus' Name; Amen.

WHAT or WHO IS A MAN of GOD?

Have you ever heard of someone refered to as a 'Man of God'?  What is or who is a True Man of God according to Scripture?  A Man of God is open to Rebuke and Correction from his Inner-Circle of Friends.  If there is Humility and a Willingness to be Teachable, there is Hope in that man.

When someone accuses a Man of God of something, he doesn't make excuses, but looks inward and examines his own heart to see if these things are true.  Sin and Temptation of others can so easily decieive us, and blind us to our own sins.  A 'Man of God', like King David, will confess them to God and Repent of them quickly. (Psalm 51).  One Acronym I like is "God can use Briken People are Faithful; People who are Avaiable, and people who are Teachable.

90% of Serving is---just showing up!  A Man of God "Shows Up" and Remains open to Godly Correction from his Inner-Circle of Close--Loyal and "Iron Sharpeing Iron" Friends and Accountability Partners, and is Teachable!

A True Man of God Confronts Error", he will not back down when things get rough.  At least Two Things we can say about a True Man of God is; he "WILL ALWAYS STAND UP" for the "TRUTH" and he "ALWAYS TAKES A STAND AGAINST ERROR" where his Faith is concerned!

A True Man of God, is Obedient to the leading of the Holy Spirit and the Word of God, (the Bible).

You cannot truly be called a "Man of God" unless you believe, follow and obey the Word of God.  God cannot effectively use men who will not obey His Word and Teaching.  (Micah 6:8); "God has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God."  (2 Corinthians 5:17); "Therefore, if any one is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old has passed away; behold, the new has come."

A Regenerated Man is a New Creation in Christ, having New Tendencies for Christ.  He will seek the things of God; His Word, His Spirit, and His Fellowship.  Our love for God will be reflected by our Obedience to Him, His Spirit and His Word.  A "Man of God" is a "Man After God's Own Heart" if he will seek and do God's Will.

Here Are Some Chracteristics of a Godly Man:

• He Keeps His Heart Pure:
• He Keeps His Mind sharp:
• He Has and Walks With Integrity:
• He Uses and Chooses His Words Wisely:
• He Works Hard to Provide For His Family:
• He Never Gives Up or Gives In To The Enemy:
• He Stands On His Word:

The Meaning of a Godly Man: (According to the Collins Dictionary); "A godly person (a man) is someone who is deeply Religious and shows Obedience to the Rules of their religions."  But we know there is much more to being Godly and God Seeking than that.  It's about his (Character, his Morals, and his Values), as well as whether he is seeking God's purpose for his life and God's Presence in his life.  Being a "Godly Man" means that he Strives towards becoming more like Christ every day. 

But, how can you really tell who is a Good Man or a Godly man?  Well, I certainly do not have all the answers, but I have found a few Character Traits that the Bible repeatedly mentions as Godly Characteristics.  Once you Identify these in oyur own  life, chances are you are striving to be a "Man After God's Own Heart."

10--Scriptural Characteristics of a Godly Man:

PERSERVERANCE: (James 1:12); "Blessed is the one who perserveres under trial, because having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love Him."  Without Perserverance, you will give up every time you encounter a challenge that you feel, you don't have what it takes to handle things or to survive the challenge.  Jesus said that we would have Trials and Trouble in our lives.  Challenges, Set-Backs, and Flat Out Failures will happen, especially in Relationships and Fiendships.  Having someone by your side that knows how to perservere is important for you and your future family, friendships, and relationships.  Someone that knows that God is Good All the Time and that everything works together for your good.  Because a Godly Man that has Perserverance will not give up at the first sign of resistance, but will be patient and trust God to work on his behalf. 

HE IS FOCUSED ON GOD'S WORD: ( Hebrews 2:1); "We must pay the most careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away."  A Godly man that commits his Focus daily to God's Word will daily strive to be truthful in everything that he says and does. 

GENEROSITY: (2 Corinthians 9:6); "Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously."  An Attitude of Giving, shows itself in relationships and friendships.  A Godly Man who knows that his riches are not earthly, but come from God, has less difficulty of letting go of his worldly possesions and worries less about money.  He knows that God can always meet his needs and will provide for him in due time.  A man that gives generously of his resources and time, attracts people that enjoy giving as well.  And a community like that is sure to bless you and your family when you are in need. 

RESPONSIBILIY: (Romans 14:12); "So then, each one of us will give an account of ourselves to God."  Being resonsible is a prime indicator of maturity and wisdom, and is therefore one of the more important characteristics of a Godly Man. 

In a relationship, you will face a lot of situations where someone needs to take charge and make a decison.  A Godly Man should be willing to do so Spirit-Led.  But also, take full responsibility for his actions in hindsight.  God's Word, (the Bible) is very clear about the fact that we all have to face Jesus at one point and take responsibility for our actions here on earth.               

HUMILITY: (Philippians 2:3-4); "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.  Rather, in humility value others above myself, not looking to your own interest of the others."  There are so many reasons why 'Humility' may be one of the most important characteristics of a Godly Man, but the most importantreason might be the following: The One Common Habit of any Healthy Relationship or Friendship, is that both people, or those involved in a Close-Knit Group, are able to lay aside selfishness and consider the other's interests and well-being as---just as important as your own.  That is only possible if all involved are willing to walk in Godly Humility.  Relatioinships can be very challenging and very confrontational at times, but only people who truly walking in True Humility are able to resist the desire to always be right and are able to acknowledge their mistakes and weaknesses can resolve disputes.  If no, the relationship can turn toxic really quickly.

HONESTY: (Proverbs 12:22); The Lord detests lying lips, but delights in people who are trustworthy."  This Personality Trait of a 'Godly Man' almost seems like a 'No Brainer', but it's worth repeating anyway.  Trust should be at the Foundation of every committed relationship.  Doshonesty is undoubtedly the fastest way of breaking that trust.  That's why honesty is one of the most important qualities to look for in a Godly Man. 

GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS: (James  1:19-20); "My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires."  I haveheard it sait that, "Communication Is Key"; However nobody really ever explains how to clearly communicate well.  But, thank God, He does through His Holy Living Word (the Bible)!  And who better to learn from than the Creator of language Himself.  God's Tip: Listen More, Speak Less, and Don't Act or React Out of Anger!  A man who is Self-Aware and can communicate well, will be able to voice his needs and wants without getting angry or abusive.  He will not be controled by his emotions or pride, but by love.  He will know how to act in order to deescalate potential arguments and make you feel heard.  Because in order to have a successful relationship and friendship, you need to know how to communicate with one another.

FORGIVENESS:  (Ephesians 4:32); "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ, God forgave you."  I will be completely honest with you, I have struggled with being forgiving in my own past, and still sometimes have that same struggle with certain people, especially with housemates and neighbors who continue to dishonor and disrespect me, just to make themselves feel better about their attitudes.  I have lost some friendshipsbecause of unforgiveness.  And there have been a few instances where I found myself still holding onto a grudge, becaus ethey just flat refuse to acknowledge their fault and disrespect, and claim that they had nothing wrong in their eyes and had done nothing to be forgiven for, or repent of, and no one has the right to corrcet them or call them out on anything, because they are more righteous than any one else around them.  But, through all this (Self-Righteous Pride) I have in most ways I have learned even in my 60's, that we have to be willing to forgive in order to heal our own hearts.   But, it also does not by any means---mean that we are commanded to forget what has been done, but we are commanded to not dwell on it!

WISDOM: (Proverbs 3:13); "Blessed are those who find wisdom, those who gain understanding."  Contrarily to popular belief, wisdom isn't just gained with age, but can beb found at a younger age as well.  How?  By Fearing God and Listening to Wise Counsel.  The last thing you want or need around you, is a man who thinks and believes that he knows everything and really doesn't, and thinks he doesn't have to listen to anyone, including you.  This kind of man is full of pride and blinded to his own self-inflated ego and self-importance.Instead, you want to be around someone that seks wisdom by seeking God's Guidance, His Word, and a Relationship with Him.  That man is humble and understands that no matter how much he knows or thinks he knows, he doesn't know it all and he needs to rely on God, and listen to wise counsel.

FEAR OF GOD: (Proverbs 1:7); "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction."  Honestly, I believe this Characteristic is the most important One of a Godly Man in any relationship and friendship.  A Christian can seem to have all of the characteristics listed above, but if he doesn't have a loving and respectful fear of God, there is no guarantee that he is not going to change his behavior and attitude at one point.  The only thing that will keep a man in check, is if he fears God and lives his life accordingly.  KNowing that God judges our behavior towards each other and sees the things we do in the daark, should encourage us to live a life of obedience.  Trust me on this, because I know first hand, a man who desires to please God and not just himself or others around him.  He is a man that doesn't take being a Christian lightly, but understands the weight of his sins.                              

A Christian Man---Follows Christ Wholeheartedly:

In following Christ as Christian Men, we understand that this world is not Ultimately our home, so we are willing to give our all to Jesus, knowing that True Life is found only in Jesus! (Matthew 10:39; John 10:10; 17:15-18; Philippians 3:20-21).  We have this promise in (James 1:12); "Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love Him."

WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO TRULY FOLLOW JESUS?

IT TAKES A REAL MAN TO FOLLOW JESUS!

Truly following Christ requires everything you have.  It's total dedication of your life and resorces to the cause of Christ.  Jesus called people to follow Him, many of whom became His Disciples.  (Matthew 4:18-22; 8:22; 9:9; 10:2-4; Luke 9:23; John 1:43).  When people were inerested in what Jesus had to say and to offer them, He put out a call to follow Him: 

(Mark 8:34-35); "And calling the crowd to Him with His disciples, He said to them, 'If anyone would come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me.'  For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and the gospel's will save it."  [also see John 3:16].

The Requirements to follow Christ are not for the "Faint of Heart"; (Luke 14:26) Jesus says: "If anyone comed to Me and does not hate his own father and mother, and wife and children, and brothers and sisters, yes and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple."  (Luke 14:33); Jesus concluded this passage by saying; "Therefore who does not renounce all that he has cannot br My disciple." 

Now, I know that this is some pretty Strong Language!  Does it really meanthat we have to hate our family members?  Hardly!  This passage does not mean that we cannot love or care for our families or the things that we have been given, but it does make the point that everything that we may possess needs to be held with an open hand, so that we may release it to Christ at any moment.  It means we have to love HIm more than we love anything else or anyone else!  Jesus said that when we follow Him, we will experience persecution for His sake> (john 15:18; Matthew 5:10, 44; 10:17-18).

(2 Timothy 3:12); Paul said; "Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted."  Persecution is uncomfortable.  Following Christ may mean that we are ridiculed by those who are closest to us.  Even some of Jesus' followers deserted HIm on the night that He was arrested. [Matthew 26:56; Mark 14:50].

To follow Christ means that every area of our life is submitted to Him.  As we surrender every part of ourselves to the Holy Spirit, we are cleansed of unrighteousness and He is able to rule and reign in our lives, making us vessels acceptable for use: (2 Timothy 2:21); "Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work."  As we follow Christ, He becomes our promary desire and the measure by which we live our lives.  We seek His Presence and Abide in HIm; [John 15:1-17].  We seek to obey Him by loving God wholeheartedly and loving others as ourselves; [John 13:34-35].

In following Christ, we understand that this world is not ultimately our home, so we are willing to give our all to HIm, knowing that true life is found only in Jesus; [Matthew 10:39; John 10:10; 17:16-18].  In James 1:12 we have this promise; "Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love Him."